▪ ■ twenty six ■ ▪

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Hey lovelies xx here's part 26!! X

Your POV

Shawn had fallen asleep in my arms last night, and when I wake his head was resting in my neck, small snores escaping his mouth.

I decide to wake him up so we could fly back to Toronto. Slowly, I take my fingers through his bed hair, and he smiles when I plant a kiss on his cheek.

"There's that smile!" I giggle as he sits himself up. Despite the smile, pain is still evident in his eyes.

"I just want to get home. No fuss, just sleep in my own bed with my fiancee." He looks at me lovingly, and I smile back.

"Come here." I wrap my arms around his neck and give him a tight hug, my fingers playing with the strands of hair near his neck. "Why don't you take a shower, I'll pack your things and we can get breakfast at the airport."

"Sounds good." Shawn replies, getting into the shower. I begin packing, everything fit into a small carryon size trolley as we were only intending to stay in New York for a day or two.

Shawn comes out of the shower and I dress him into skinny jeans and a maroon hoodie.

"Right small steps. The medic told you to take it easy sweetie." I reach out for Shawn's arm and hold it as we walk out of the hotel.

Paparazzi

Independent photographers who take pictures of high-profile people, typically while subjects go about their usual life routines.

We were greeted by them outside the hotel. I knew Shawn had a migraine, he would get dizzy when he got them which meant he couldn't walk straight without help, and right now he was leaning on me.

"Hold my hand tight." He tells me and I nod. We begin pushing past, the flash irritating my eyes. I look at Shawn and he stops.

"Shawn"

"My head Y/N... the light..." I wrap my arms around his hips tight and I almost carry him into the taxi.

"Shawn are you okay?" I ask, patting his leg.

"Not really Y/N... the lights made my migraine really bad and everything is hurting."

"Lay your head in my lap." I suggest, and he obeys, his hand holding my leg for comfort. I begin massaging his head and shoulders to ease his pain, taking my fingers through his damp hair.

"Thanks Y/N... I'm so tired." He yawns.

"The airport is an hour away normally and its the morning rush hour. You'll be lucky if you make it in three hours." The taxi driver explains.

We were flying private so that wasn't too much of an issue.

It gave Shawn an opportunity to get some rest, and I bought a blanket with me so he could stay warm. He was shivering because he had a fever. I put my earphones in and we travel like that, Shawn sleeping in my arms.





It was now October, and Toronto had begun to get cold. We didn't check the forecast so were surprised at how much colder it was compared to New York. I had gotten Shawn a wheelchair to get him through the terminal as he wasn't allowed to walk far.

We get into yet another taxi. It was nearly 2pm so traffic wasn't too bad.

"We're home Shawn." He had fallen asleep again. I assumed he was emotionally drained from the last few weeks which is why he was sleeping so much.

"Finally. I can get into my own bed!" He jokes and we go into our apartment, Shawn quickly undressing and getting into bed.

I look through the kitchen cabinets to see what I could cook for dinner.

There was barely anything here, so I decide to order pizza.

Just then, there was a knock on the door. It was Selena.

"Hey Y/N. I heard about what happened. How is Shawn?" She asks, hugging me.

"Honestly, he's not okay and he's not had a good few weeks. He was so upset last night. I've never seen anyone cry that much Sel." I was really stressed out about Shawn. "He really isn't well, and this Hailey situation is not helping. The therapy didn't help much either."

"With CBT you need motivation to take on the work needed and it also requires you to forget about the past. In Shawn's case he can't. I think his depression is worse than we thought."

A single tear falls down my cheek.

"I... I don't want to lose him! When I found his asleep in the bathtub, part of me thought he was dead! I'm so worried about him, he was getting better and its just all gone and..." I just burst into tears. Selena gives me a hug, telling me that Shawn will be fine.

"I think anti depressants are what he needs. That way his mood will improve so he will have the motivation to get better." Selena suggests.

"What about the pain? He's in agony, physically, every day."

"You never know, with lupus it can go into remission. It took three doses of chemo for me to go into remission after my transplant and I've been okay for a while now." Selena exclaims.

"He has another chemo session in two days and that's his third one." I put the kettle on to make some tea for Shawn. "He's been writing more. His third album is fully written and he's recorded a few songs but its the fact that he can't do press which worries him. I think he's well known and successful enough to release it now with no promo and it'll do well."

"I'll talk to him. Maybe he could do a phone interview, or the host could come here." Selena says.

"Good idea. Lemme check on Shawn." I go into our bedroom and as I do, Shawn walks out of the shower in just his boxers.

"Hey Y/N."

"Shawn I need to feed you." I say in a worried way. He had lost weight due to stress and depression. "I've ordered a pizza for us. It'll be here in an hour or so."

"Thanks Y/N. Can I sleep till then? I'm so tired."

I nod and I'm about to leave.

"Y/N please can you cuddle me?"

"Of course Shawn." I lay beside him and he moves his head into my neck, and I stroke his hair to ease him to sleep.

I'm so tired rn idek why

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