*** Aug's finger tats in the M/M****
AMBER P.O.V. –
I had finished packing, and convinced Tanya tocheck on my house while I was gone, since my mother wouldn’t.
“Here.” I handed August a Target bag with his shaving cream and got in bed.
He was about to put it in his bag when he realized something else was in there. A huge grin came across his face.
“Somebodies coming to Paris prepared to take all her man 12 inches.” He shook the box of condoms.
“Whatever. Just put them in your bag.” I blushed a little from embarrassment.
He laughed and put them in his bag. He zipped up his luggage, rolled it up by the door next to mine, then got in bed.
He patted on his chest, indicating he wanted me to lay there.
I laid with the back of my head on his chest, where we were both facing the ceiling. He put his left arm across my breast. And ran his right hand through my hair.
“What time is Stacy going to be here in the morning?”
“5.” Aug softly kissed my forehead, still rubbing my hair. His right knee that was up, was swaying back and forth.
I played with his hand that was over my chest. And ran my finger over the Bang tattoo on his index finger.
Looking at the tattoo, I had to ask about the arrest record. It was bothering me too bad. I refrained from talking about it while his nieces were here, because I just thought that was inappropriate.
That was a private conversation between he and I, and they didn’t need to get involved. Or hear us arguing if it came to that.
My only fear was that if I brought it up, he would react negatively. And we all know Aug can go from 0 to 100 real quick. I had to ease my way into it. I just wanted the truth so I could have some sort of peace of mind.
“Babe?”
“Huh?”
“Why did you get those tats on your trigger fingers?” I played with his left finger with the tat.
“I thought we already talked about this.” He said calmly.
“You never gave me a straight answer.”
“Why? They bother you?”
“It had to be some significant reason to make you get them.”
“It was a pact between me and my cousin.”
“Pact about what?”
“Damn you nosey.” He laughed.
“Is it because you killed somebody?”
He stopped rubbing my hair.
“Babe?” I sat up, turned around and looked at him.
He just looked at me with an expression I couldn’t read. He scratched his left cheek, then grabbed my hand and started playing with my fingers.
I didn’t know what was going through his head, but I wanted him to know our relationship was a safe place. Meaning, anything we could not share with the outside world, was safe between us.
I got on top of him.
“Baby, this is the no judgment zone. Whatever you say, I’m still your anchor. I promise.” I kissed his lips and laid my head in the crook of his neck.
He rubbed my back. There was a moment of silence. Then he spoke.
“This shit between us.” He looked down at me.
“Of course.” I sat up on top of him and looked in his eyes.
He wrapped his arms around my waist, resting his hands on my behind.
“My brother’s killer got not guilty at his trial. Me and my squad knew he was guilty tho. And it was no way in hell we was gonna let this nigga just walk around free, when my brother was dead. It was a stupid decision. I shoulda just let karma get his ass. But I was running off of pure anger. The anger of seeing my family hurt. The anger of a nigga having the nerve to kill my brother, because Mel, man he was my older brother. You look up to your older brother as like a protector, and you could never tell me a nigga would’ve killed him. So my cousin went with me to find that nigga. We did. I handled it. But my cousin took the fall for me so I could go to college. Sneak said Yung, you one of the only niggas in the NOLA that got a chance to make it out, I’m not gon let you fuck it up.”
“He still in jail?”
“Yeah. 30 years.”
“How old is he?”
“22.”
“He’s technically still a baby in my eyes. Half of his life will be gone.”
“I know. The whole situation is sad and I owe him my life. I begged him not to do it, but, before I could even talk to the cops he admitted to it. So me achieving ain’t just about me. I work hard not just for a house or car. I’m at the top of my class, not just so I can be the best dentist I can be. I got niggas ridin’ on my shoulder. It’s for Mel, it’s for Sneak, it’s for my three angels, it’s for my mama. It’s for the niggas in my hood that feel they ain’t got a chance. I want them to know if Yung can make it out this shit, they can too. And just when I was about to lose sight of everything, give up everything I worked hard for and give up on everybody that’s riding on my shoulder, God sent you. And I don’t want to freak you out, but sometime while you sleep, I just look at you and whisper a prayer thanking God for you. I can’t even put into words how much you mean to me. But I know I dropped some heavy shit. And if you choose not to fuck with a nigga no more, I understand. Not saying the shit won’t hurt. But I’ll understand.”
I laid back down in the crook of his neck. Silent. Just trying to take it all in. I felt his heart beat speed up. I suppose the silence scared him because he turned his head over to look at me.
“You gon leave me?” He searched my eyes.
I rubbed his hair. “I don’t agree with what you did, but I know why you did it. And no I’m not gon leave you baby.”
I softly pressed my lips against his.
“I love you.” He said as we pulled away.
“I love you too.”
