Forever In My LIFE (Book 4) 2nd Alternate

Part 64

With the final show complete in Washington, I anxiously await Prince's return home, and his promised visit to his doctor to see about his hip pain.

The week following his return home, it seems as though he's trying to turn attention away from himself and onto me. He's quiet and contemplative as he watches me play my roles as wife and mother. In annoyance of my every action being scrutinized, I finally ask him about his plans to see the doctor.

"I'll schedule it, but I'm worried about you," he says softly as he looks deep into my eyes.

"Me?" I pretend to be confused, I had hoped he hadn't noticed that I just haven't been feeling like myself these past few days.

He studies my eyes and my face, "Yes, you." His hand reaches out to stroke my cheek, "You seem distracted, and you look tired, Sugar." Worry is etched onto his face.

"Oh, no, you don't, Mister, we're not turning this around. You promised you'd see about that hip after the final show. That's been over a week ago," I remind him.

"I said I'll schedule it, and I will. But in the meantime, I'd like to bring someone in to help you with Ramiel."

I shake my head adamantly, "No. I won't have some stranger help raise our child."

Prince bites the inside of his cheek, this didn't go as he had planned, "Then I'm increasing the housekeepers visits to once a week." I think this is a waste of money, but I don't argue with his decision, I can tell from his mannerisms that this new setup has already been arranged.

"That's fine," I agree, Ramiel's boundless energy and high intelligence keeps me so occupied that I won't mind this added assistance.

Prince schedules his doctor's appointment for the following week, but manages to arrange a spa day for me the very next afternoon. He's stalling, I think to myself as I enjoy my day of pampering, I just wished I felt more like myself.

When I stroll into the house after my appointment, I feel even more spoiled when a delicious aroma wafts out of the kitchen. Surprise overtakes me when I walk in to find Ray. "Mrs. Nelson! Did you have a nice time?"

"Y-yes, I did." I look around the room, "Where's Prince?"

"Outside with Ramiel. Dinner will be ready in about 20 minutes," he smiles as he returns his attention to the pan on the stove.

When I find them in the backyard, I'm informed that Ray with be coming to our house twice a week to prepare meals for us.

"Is my cooking that bad?" I feel hurt.

"No, Sugar, just trying to free up some of your time."

"What are you not telling me, Prince? Something is going on." I push for more information.

"There's nothing going on, just a feeling I have," he grins as Ramiel crawls back and forth between our laps, seeking attention from the both of us.

"You and your feelings," I tease with an exaggerated eye roll. "Thank you for today, I enjoyed myself," I tell him before leaning in to kiss his cheek and caress his arm.

When Prince leans in to kiss my lips, Ramiel reaches out to take my face in his hands and kisses me first. "My Mama," his words are unmistakably clear. Prince mouths a surprised 'oh' and we both laugh, toddler possessiveness has begun.

******

As the week of Prince's doctor's appointment draws to an end, I can tell he's dreading the appointment, but his ongoing attentiveness to me continues. I can't lie, it's beyond unnerving, especially since I'm not sure if it has anything to do with the impending appointment.

When Prince arrives home after meeting with doctor, he retreats to his office without a word. I occupy Ramiel the best I can, he's always especially excited whenever Prince leaves and returns, and I have to pull him away from the closed office door several times. After an hour, when Ramiel returns to the door with pleading 'Da-da's' I allow him to continue, the door finally opens. "Hey, Little Man," my heart aches when I hear the forced, cheerful greeting as Prince scoops him up. I eye Prince worriedly, when he twists his lips and he averts his gaze I know that we're not discussing today's visit anytime soon.

This is the first time in weeks that the tables have been turned and I spend the rest of day carefully watching him. Interactions with Ramiel are the only thing that bring forth a genuine smile or laughter, but I can sense his mind is deep in thought.

It's just past two in the morning when the display monitor shows that Ramiel had finally fallen asleep, I set my book down on the nightstand and head towards the stairs. Prince is still playing the piano, actually he has been since we kissed Ramiel goodnight over an hour ago.

I move down the steps, watching him as I go, he senses me and glances up, offering a small smile, but his playing never falters. I'm sure he knows why I'm coming down, and I hope he's willing to discuss the doctors visit with me. When I sit on the bench next to him, his fingers stop, "Why are you still up?" The question drips with concern.

"I was reading, waiting for Ramiel to fall asleep," I look him in the eye, "and hoping you'd join me."

Another small smile, "I'll be up soon, Sugar. Get some rest." I'm pulled in for a tender kiss before he pushes some of my hair behind my ear. "Go," it's a soft whisper, I've been dismissed.

He's not ready to talk yet, I think to myself as he resumes playing. The sound of the piano continues on as I climb the stairs, use the bathroom, and make my way back to the bed. I have just settled when I hear the music stop, my eyes scan the dark room as I listen to the silence before the sound of the elevator car starts, it's muffled, and I would never have heard it if I wasn't still awake. The sound stops and I hear the doors open, then close, the silence returns. I listen closely for any indication of Prince passing through our bedroom, there is nothing until I hear the soft click of the latch on the bathroom door. I turn my head just long enough to verify the door is closed, seeing the sliver of light appear at the bottom, then roll back into my comfortable position and wait.

Only moments pass before I hear the faint sound of the toilet flush and door knob engage, within seconds I feel movement at the bed. He doesn't say a word as he climbs in, when I feel his movements come to a stop, he's not pressed against me. I roll over, and feeling with my hand, I discern that he is laying on his back, his arms above his head. "Hey," I whisper, snuggling closer and resting my head on his chest.

"Hey," he breathes, kissing the top of my head. I feel his right arm come down to absentmindedly stroke my back. I don't push, I just wait. The fact that he has come to bed and laid down on his back indicates to me that he's ready to talk. I know it's only a matter of minutes, but it feels like forever that I lay there listening to his heartbeat, my hand on his stomach rises and falls with his even breathing. "The doctor suspects my hip replacement is failing," his voice is just above a whisper. I swallow a lump in my throat and wait for him to continue, without thinking, my hand flexes over his abdomen. "He took X-rays and I have to go for an MRI. We'll discuss my options after the results are back," his words are rushed, like pulling a bandaid off a wound.

"Is this common?" I whisper, shifting to look up at him, even though I really can't see him in the darkness.

"He said it was, especially people who get a replacement before 50, or who are quite active."

"You think they might have warned you about this possibility before you had the procedure," I mumble, aggravated.

"They did," he responds dryly.

"Oh." I fall silent for a moment. "So, this means...surgery?"

I feel his head nod as he sighs. I lay my head back down on his chest and stare into the darkness. I don't know why the thought of surgery had never crossed my mind, but it does little to ease my worry. His arm wraps tighter around my shoulders and my hand grips his side. The word surgery repeats itself in my mind.