Church Sex Camp

Chapter 33- Onward

It was the day of the funeral.

Eli had taken care of everything. All I had to do was approve his choices. I was extremely grateful, even if I struggled in showing it.

I had been feeling much better, the guilt still weighed heavily on me, but I no longer felt the need to voice it. My mind had released my tongue.

It sounded strange, saying anything other than a confession of guilt. Even though I knew it was unfounded, all I could think about was the fact that she would still be alive if I had just listened to her. It wasn't easy, but eventually I willed myself to speak.

Meg decided to stay for a few more days, just until after the funeral. Which I was happy about, to an extent. As much as I loved my best friend, she did not make for a pleasant house guest. I'd always known she was..... animated, but her constant attempts to make me engage in conversation wore me out quickly. Thank God for Eli!

I hadn't planned on making love to him so soon after leaving the hospital, but I felt a desperate need to be held that day. I needed his arms around me while in the bath. When we kissed, I felt all my pain fade away. I wanted to feel something other than the pain.

It was another reason I was glad Meg was leaving after the funeral. She hadn't exactly been discreet about hearing us. It made things very uncomfortable for me. I shouldn't have been shy about it, sex was basically our business. But I'd always been that way. Where she had always been more open.

I sat in the front row of the same church where Eli's sister had been married. I was just in front of the space my mother had been sitting next to me only a few weeks before.

The ceremony was very tasteful. As much as I'd have preferred a different type of service, it was exactly how she would have liked it. Demure and somber.

When the minister asked if I wanted to say a few words, I hesitated. I'd prepared a eulogy, but the thought of speaking made my palms sweat.

Eli nudged me and I could tell he was about to go up there for me, when I placed a hand on his arm.

"I'll go."

"Okay, I'm right here if you need me."

He kissed my cheek and I stood to go up to the pulpit. I could feel my hands shaking as I pulled my notes out.

"Id like to thank you all for being here. My mother, Yvonne, was very passionate about her beliefs. Her two great loves were me... and God. She always made sure I had everything I needed, even though it was just the two of us. It wasn't easy being a single mother, especially since she was a firm believer. She was judged harshly, but never wavered. When I married and left home, she used her free time to volunteer to help others. I never knew her to be idle. She would do anything for those she loved........"

It was getting to me. The heaviness of my words. The shame I felt.

"Um... sorry. I had a lengthy speech written, but now... I'm just going to wing it. Yvonne Stratton was not always the easiest to live with. She held so firmly to her beliefs that we often butt heads. That being said, she always listened. If I had an argument, she considered it. Sometimes she conceded, other times I did. When my marriage ended, she did everything she could to change my mind. She felt that I has made a mistake, but she didn't have all the facts. I never blamed her for her opinions. When I eventually told her the whole truth, she had my back. In truth, she'd had it all along. She was so happy when she saw that I'd found love again.... well not again. But that's not important........ In her final act on this Earth, she gave up her own life for mine. I hate that she's gone.......... I wish...... I..."

Eli stood and came to my side, pulling me into an embrace. I broke down and melted in his arms. He went to the microphone.

"Thanks again."

He escorted me back to the pew and handed me a tissue. After a quick prayer, we were excused to get ready for the processional to the graveyard.

Thankfully it was a clear day, and there was a light breeze, keeping the heat at bay. The ground was damp though, from rain the day before, making it difficult to walk. Eli held me close, keeping me on my feet.

After the short ceremony, I got a better look at the gravestone. It was beautiful. I'd never have imagined that I would be grateful for a tombstone. Eli had commissioned it, and I was in awe.

The engraved cross was intricate in design and ivy was carved all the edges. Under her name and dates was inscribed a loving tribute.

Her courage and
compassion will live on.

I could barely breathe. It was perfect. Simple, but intense. Just like her.

***

It was time for Megan to leave for the next camp. She didn't want to go, but we both knew it was important. The camp was booked out, and even though some people were worried because of what happened, a explanation of the event eased their minds.

"CeCe, I'm going to miss you so much! We've been through this together this whole time, the thought of you not being there is daunting!"

"Meg...... I know for a fact that you will be fine. You're going to be great! You've always been better at this than me. Admit it! None of this would have happened without you. Plus, I'm not retiring or anything. I'm just sitting this one out. Winter session, I'll be there for the opening ceremony. And I'm just a phone call away. Any issues that come up, you know I'll handle them."

She nodded throughout everything I said, but still looked unsure.

"Hey. We're family. I'm not going anywhere. Okay?"

"I love you, CeCe. As soon as this camp in over, I'm coming right back here!"

Oh fiddlesticks!

"Mmmhhhhmmm"

"You do want me to come back... right?"

"Of course! We'll make sure to get you into a..... uummmm..."

"Ah, you just want me out of the house. I get it now."

She feigned hurt, but I could tell she was laughing.

"You know you're always welcome. Just... if it's going to be more than a day, maybe you could stay at your place in Chicago?"

She laughed and nodded in understanding.

"As much fun as its been, I wholeheartedly agree. You're just too damn loud."

My face was burning hot! Just then, Eli stepped outside, ready to take Meg to the airport. Originally I was going to take her, but we both agreed it would be better to say goodbye at the camp. We were emotional enough.

"What are you two talking about? Since CeCe's blushing, I'm guessing it has something to do with me."

That made Meg burst out laughing. I followed soon after. It was the perfect time to say our goodbyes.

"Be safe. You'll be in my prayers."

"You too."

We hugged and she got into the car. Eli approached and gave me a quick kiss. He planned on picking up lunch on his way back, so I could rest.

After they left, I decided to go out back. I'd planned on a nap, but I was too wound up. By the time Eli got home, I was pacing on the back deck.

"Hey, I've got food. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, it's just all settling in, you know? The baby, the wedding, the future in general. I'm trying not to stress, but I'm too worked up."

"I know something that might help."

Based on the look on his eyes, I knew exactly what he was thinking.

"Shouldn't we eat first?"