Is This A Fairytale (A MGG Fanfiction)

Chapter 37: Our Anniversary pt. 1

Matthew's Point of View

"So what do you guys think?" I ask the "team" as we sit around the conference table between takes. I returned to work a few weeks ago, just as we began shooting for the new season. 

"Matthew this is wonderful!" states Paget.

"She's going to love it," Joe says.

"It's lovely, she will love it," AJ says, handing back the anniversary gift I made for Kaylie. I finished painting different events from our life and decided to bind them up into a book, each with a handwritten description of the day and why it means so much to me, why she means so much to me. 

"You guys really think so? I know things are getting better with Kaylie, her sessions with Dr. Matherson are really helping, but I'm afraid this is too much. While Kaylie's getting better, our relationship still feels strained...I don't want to be the cause of a bump in her recovery." I say looking at the book in my hands. 

"Matthew, you've been tiptoeing around Kaylie for months, and don't get me wrong I love her, we all do, but you've have been more than supportive through everything, but you haven't been happy, you miss your wife, so show her how much you miss his, how much you love her. She's never going to fully heal if you stay passive and pretend like you're fine. I think it's okay if you show her a bit of how you're really feeling." Shemar states matter-of-factly.

"I think Shemar is right sweetie, Kaylie needs to heal, but so do you, and there's no better way to do that than together. Give her the gift, and show her you love her. It's your anniversary for heaven's sake!" Kirsten says. 

"Thanks, guys, I really needed to hear that," I say just as the director tells us to reset the scene. 

In the following days, I plan out every last detail of the anniversary plans I have for Kaylie and I. Saturday has to be perfect so I've enlisted the help of AJ, Kirsten, and Shemar. 

"Kaylie, can I ask you something?" I say turning to Kaylie as she sits at the kitchen table eating cold pizza from the night before while she reads the newspaper. 

"Yeah, what is it?" she says as she looks up at me.

"I was wondering if you were up to going out tonight?" I ask hesitantly.

"I was actually going to ask you the same thing," she says smiling "I know things haven't been...exactly..normal around here lately, but..it is our anniversary."

"I didn't know if you remembered," I say, trying not to sound shocked.

"Of course I remembered, how could I forget?" she asks, standing up, walking over to me, wrapping her arms around my waist, I can feel her tense up, she hasn't done this in months, I gently wrap my arms around her, rubbing small circles into her back with my thumb, I place a soft kiss on the top of her head, she relaxes and tightens her grip for a minute before releasing me, stepping back.

"So..uhh..did you have something in mind?" She asks shyly. 

"As a matter of fact I do, if you don't mind leaving the house? It's nothing fancy, we won't run into many people, just a walk down by the bay and maybe grab some ice cream on our way home?" I say.

"That sounds great," she says "I'm going to go get ready!" She actually sounds excited for tonight, maybe I don't have anything to worry about. I stand in the kitchen for a few minutes before heading upstairs to change. I search through the closet to find something to wear, black high-top converse, and dark blue jeans. I stand in the closet holding up a dark purple button up shirt and a gray t-shirt with a black jacket. I want to look nice, but I don't want it to feel too fancy. 

"I like the shirt and jacket" I turn to see Kaylie peaking around the closet door, a towel wrapped around her wet hair. 

"T-shirt and jacket it is then," I say smiling at her," I'm just going to get changed and I'll leave you to get ready."

I quickly change, brush my hair and teeth and wait out on the patio for Kaylie. 

1 new text message

Kirsten: Have you left yet? We have everything ready!

Me: Not yet, Kaylie is getting ready, I'll text you when we leave. Thanks for all your help!

"Are you ready to go?" I turn and see Kaylie standing in the doorway, smiling. I haven't seen her look this happy in months.

"You look beautiful," I say, she's dressed casually, but she's looked so frail and sick, it's good to see her like this, in brown healed booties, dark blue skinny jeans, and maroon t-shirt, a long gold necklace, matching earrings. She even did her hair and make-up. hair slightly curled, half up, make-up subtle, but beautiful. "I'm ready if you're ready." I send Kirsten a quick message as we head out the door. 

I drive us to the park by the bay where we used to spend a lot of time, we've gone a few times the past few weeks. I park the car and walk around to the passenger side, opening the door for Kaylie. We head off towards the bridge at the far end of the park. Kaylie doesn't speak, just walks, looking around at the other people in the park, or out at the water glistening under the setting sun. I take a breath, and take a chance, I reach over and grab Kaylie's hand, lightly, but she doesn't pull away, she laces our fingers together, steps closer to me and places her free hand just above my elbow. We walk in silence until we are standing on the bridge, looking out over the water, the sky turning a deep purple and vibrant pink/orange. Kaylie turns to me and begins to speak. 

Kaylie's Point of View

"Matthew, I'm so sorry for everything I've put you through the past few months. You've done nothing to deserve the way I've been treating you. I know you're going through a lot too, and I wasn't being fair." I say Matthew tries to cut me off. "Please let me finish, or I don't know if I'll be able to say what I need to say to you." I continue " My sessions with Dr. Matherson, they've really helped me. I've worked through a lot of stuff from losing my family, getting pregnant when I was on birth control before we even really talked about when we wanted to have kids, being abducted, losing Grayson, finding out..."I cut myself off, this isn't the time. "I kept all my emotions inside and turned into a shell of a person when I should have been there for you. Losing my family had to have been hard for you too, you never really got to know your in-laws very well, but you stood by my side, you've always been my rock. You knew I was pregnant before I even did, and I never once asked you how you felt about it, I just assumed you were happy because you never said otherwise, but I realize now, you wouldn't have said anything, I was sick, you never do anything to make me feel worse or hurt me. When I was taken, all I wanted was to be back with you, I had no idea if you were safe or not, but when I woke up in the hospital and saw you were okay, then you told me about the baby, we had lost the baby I don't know, something changed in me. I wasn't thinking how we had lost our baby, all I could think was how I lost your son, how I couldn't protect him. I kept waiting for you to tell me you didn't love me. Then I found out I couldn't have kids, honestly, I'm still kind of waiting for you to change your mind." I take a breath, Matthew squeezes my hand, but he doesn't speak. "I kept pushing you away because I was afraid of losing you. if I kept pushing I thought it would hurt less if you left me. I couldn't face you, I felt so guilty, and after time passed, I couldn't bring myself to be close to you, I got lost in my own head, couldn't make sense of what I was feeling. None of this is your fault, and I shouldn't have treated you like it was, I shouldn't have punished you for my guilt. You were there for me through it all, you never had a chance to be sad and grieve, I took that away from you and I am so sorry. I am so sorry for everything. Matthew, I love you, more than anything, and if you'll give me the chance I want to, need to make it up to you, to be the wife I should have been from the beginning. Matthew, I miss you, I miss my husband." I can't hold back my tears, they stream down my face. I look up at Matthew, I didn't realize he had started crying as well.  He pulls me into a tight embrace, I grasp at his shirt, crying into his chest.