Be More Chill One-Shots

Ouch

🌼🌼WARNING WARNING There are some MAJOR trigger warnings in this chapter. There is quite a bit of self hate and dysphoria. This is not a happy chapter beauties, please stay safe. WARNING WARNING🌼🌼

"HeEeELLOo!!" There was a bang on the door "Some of us have to pee here!"

Michael lifted his face from his hands and growled, rolling his eyes and coming up with the excuse he always used with his mothers.

"I'm having my period!!" He screamed back.

There was a beat of silence and then "Take your time honey!"

He laughed and then sighed again.

Coming to this party was a mistake.

Wading through crowds of drunk teenagers was a mistake.

Hiding in the bathroom was a mistake. Waiting for Jeremy was a mistake.

Michael sniffled as more tears ran down his face, a chocked sob escaping his throat.

Jeremy. 

Jeremy. 

Jeremy. 

J e r e m y.

The entire fucking reason he was at his damned place.

He sat inside the bathtub, the sound of music blaring through his ears. Michael scrolled through his camera roll on his phone.

"Twelve years of best-friendship huh" he choked out to no one in particular, opening a particular picture of them in front of a rolling rink

He sniffled a smile, wiping his tears slightly. He kept scrolling through pictures, pictures of him and Jeremy during their day of high school, dumb pictures of them using the puppy filter, the day Jeremy got his braces, going to the Weird Al concert and Anime con.

Michael hit delete on all of them.

"We were inseparable" he whispered "Best friends."

He stopped deleting at a particular picture. Michael was smiling widely while Jeremy was rolling his eyes. The filipino holding up his while backpack up to the acne covered boy's one. When matched up the big bulky black letters written on both the bags spelt 'BOYF' 'RIENDS'.

"Pathetic, I couldn't even confess" He rolled his eyes and deleted that picture too.

Everything was unclear, his head was raging with a headache, he was shaking uncontrollably and hyperventilating at this point. Suddenly a familiar song broke through the haze of loud crappy pop music. He smiled softly at the familiar words.

"We sang this at my thirteenth birthday-the one no one showed up for-we sang this all night in my basement" Michael said, getting out of the bathtub

"I still know the words my memory" he whispered

"Oooh!! I wanna dance with somebody!!" Michael sang out, spinning around on the blue carpet. "I wanna feel the heAT!!!"

He spun around and did the dance moves he learnt in salsa clases. His movements were fluid and smooth, jovial and carefree. "YeeEAAH!! I wanna dance with somebody!"

He slipped on the carpet and laughed as he caught himself on the sink, his knuckles turning white as he gripped for tear life and tried to catch his breath.

"With somebody who loves-" he heaved and lifted himself up, looking at his puffed up face in the mirror

His eyes were red, his face was blotchy and tear stained. Sniffling he wiped tears from his eyes, his bracelets jingling as he did so. He looked down at his black sweater, the word CREEPS stitched on messily in bright light green. The sweater went over his stomach and chest, covering his arms up to his shoulders. But he knew what was under that.

Michael sighed shakily. If he was getting rid of Jeremy from his life he was going to get rid of every memory. With a heave he pulled off the sweater, revealing the white and weed leaf printed binder he wore underneath. He saw his ugly stretch marks, scars, and, his disgusting chest which just refused to look right. Michael covered his mouth with a shaky hand and choked back a sob. 

Do it. A voice in the back of his head echoed

You don't need him.

Tear it OFF.

He let out a strangled cry and fell next to the side of the bathtub, he blubbered as rivers of tears split out of his eyes, onto his face and pooled on top of the tiled floor.

"Pathetic." He sobbed "Who could ever, ever, love a loser like you"

Michael let out another cry and wiped his face, more tears quickly replacing the ones he had wiped off. He cried his lungs out, he cried till he had no more air left, he cried and cried and cried. He didn't care that other people were knocking, he ignored the shouting from outside, he didn't bother wiping his face and getting up till the smell of smoke filled his nostrils.

"Oh thank God you finally opened the door!!"

He was met face to face with a dark skinned girl, her dark brown hair in dreadlocks, she wore a frilly rainbow clown costume. She grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the bathroom

"Jenna what?!What is going-going-" Michael coughed before he could finish the sentence, his legs buckling under him

He didn't notice the flames devouring furniture, or smoke so thick he couldn't see five feet infront of himself. Jenna grabbed Michael's body and threw him over her shoulder

"Fire! Fire there was a fire-Rich set a fire-Michael you could've died!"

"I would've been better off dead" he whispered with a cough, struggling to hold on to Jenna as he felt himself pass out

"Oh honey! No! No you wouldn't have-Hey! Hey-look at me we're almost out of here-" Jenna assured him, only stopping to shout at Jake not to go rescue Rich

"What an awesome party." Michel coughed out "I'm so glad I came"

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Angst storm over folks! This is my take on what happens during MITB, please correct me if I wrote anything wrong. Michael says some things here which I do not approve of, please remember you're all beautiful. Keep it Classy!~🌼Goldi🌼