Babysitter Wanted

18

A/N: there are mentions of suicide and depression in this chapter so if you're easily triggered please don't read this chapter. I typically write based on personal experiences so it has become pretty detailed and real to me and I don't want to trigger any of my lovely readers because I love you guys.

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After what happened with Hoseok I decided not to stay home. Shortly after I made him leave I packed my bag full of clean clothes and went straight back to Jimin's house.

I pulled into the driveway and ran to the front door and while I was trying to find the house key the door opened. I looked up and saw Jimin with a worried expression. "Hey, what's wrong? I thought you went back to your apartment."

I dropped my bag and hugged him tightly. Hoseok was unstable and angry. There was no way I could sleep at night thinking that something could happen to them... thinking that he could hurt them because of me.

"I-I'm here. I'm here. I'm going to protect you. I promise I'll never let anything ever happen to you or to Seyoon." I buried my face in his shoulder. I was so relieved that they were safe I just wanted to cry.

Jimin Hughes me back, confused and very concerned about what I was talking about. "Alright. It's alright. We aren't going anywhere." He rubbed his hands up and down my back, trying to comfort me. "Come inside. Let's sit down, take a deep breath, and then you can tell me what happened."

I nodded my head and grabbed his hand as we walked inside. Seyoon was sitting in front of the tv completely mesmerized by the cartoon characters on the screen. He didn't even noticed I was there.

I followed Jimin into the kitchen. "Sit down. Do you want anything to drink?" I sat down and took a deep breath. What was I supposed to say? 'Hey babe, I don't want to alarm you, but my crazy ex best friend, who is madly in love with me by the way, could possibly stalk and/or try to hurt you or your son to get back at me for trying to cut him out of my life?' I can't do that to him... can I? "Yoongi?" I snapped out of my thoughts and looked at him. "Are you alright?"

He poured me a glass of wine. "Yeah... I just... I needed to be here. I need to make sure no one hurts you."

He set the glass in front of me and took a seat next to me at the table. "Who do you think is going to hurt us?"

I had to tell him. "I used to have a best friend named Hoseok. We have known each other for years and over the years he developed romantic feelings for me. Since I've known him I've constantly had to stop him from hurting himself... or killing himself... and then one day he we were talking in my car and he grabbed my hand and tried to kiss me." I stopped for a second to look at Jimin.

He was paying close attention to my words and I'm sure that by now it was obvious to him what was going on, but I needed him to know everything.

I took a sip of the wine he had given me to calm my nerves. "I made him stop and I told him that things between us could never happen because I just didn't see him as anything more than my friend... so he got worse. Being his friend at that point meant devoting every second of my time to making sure he didn't try to kill himself. Every single day I was talking him down from overdosing on medication... or slitting his wrists... or hanging himself."

Jimin held my hand. He could hear in my voice that I was showing some emotions I never wanted him to see.

"I know it sounds horrible, but it was exhausting. I didn't have a life anymore. I wasn't allowed to hangout with other people or have a relationship with anyone or have a real job because any time that I wasn't with him made him want to die and I just couldn't live that way. It was too much for me... so I left. I told him I couldn't do this anymore and every time before that I had tried to leave he would call me in the middle of the night telling me he was feeling like he was goin to kill himself and it was just so manipulative and cruel because I was exhausted and I didn't want to be the one responsible for him dying." I felt tears rolling down my cheeks. I felt myself shaking and my breath was staggering.

"Yoongi... it's alright. You haven't done anything." Jimin wiped my tears.

"There was one night that he called... and I didn't answer. All night I was absolutely terrified that because I didn't answer he would be dead, but the the next day he called again. And then he called again the day after that." I stopped for a second and let out a little chuckle. It was inappropriate for the conversation, but I just couldn't help myself. "He wasn't dead. I felt like he was using his suicidal tendencies to try to manipulate me into coming back, but not having to look after him was so refreshing because I saw now that he didn't really need me. I had my life back and he was still living. So I moved to Seoul to get a fresh start... and I found out that he followed me here."

I took another sip of the wine. The story made me sound like an awful person for abandoning someone who I thought needed my help, but helping him was tearing me apart. It was sucking the life out of me.

"He's been leaving notes on my apartment door so that every time I go home I'm reminded that he's here. He knows I won't answer his calls so that was what he resorted to. When I didn't respond to any of them he decided that if he wanted my attention he would have to see me in person so he showed up at my apartment today." Jimin looked at me with even more concern. I detected a hint of fear behind his eyes as well.

"What happened? D-did he threaten you?" He was losing his nerve.

"He didn't threaten me. We talked and I told him to leave me alone. I told him I'm happy now and that I'm part of a family now." I squeezed Jimin's hand for support. "He asked what your names were. I told him no because I'm afraid of what he'll do to you just to get me back. We screamed at each other and I wanted to hit him so badly... and I was scared." I took a deep breath and turned sideways in my chair so that I was directly facing him. "I don't ever want anything to happen to my family."

A tear fell from Jimin's eye. "Yoongi hyung? Appa?" We both turned in the direction of the small voice. "Why are you crying?"

I smiled and opened my arms for Seyoon to come closer so I could hug him. He quickly ran over to me and I squeezed him tightly. "We're just really really happy. Don't worry about us. Alright?"

I let go of Seyoon and met eyes with Jimin. I was so grateful to have them in my life. He leaned in close to me and I thought he was going to hug me, but when his lips met mine I was surprised.

Until now Jimin and I had been doing our best to avoid kissing or showing too much affection in front of Seyoon. I was shocked he would pull something like that with his son in the room.

He pulled away gently and looked at me and then to Seyoon. "Seyoon... how would you like it if Yoongi hyung spent the night with us?"

The boy's face lit up and he hugged his dad. "That would be super fun! Can we make a fort?" He looked so excited.

Jimin looked at me with a smile. "His new thing is forts." He rolled his eyes and looked back to Seyoon. "Of course we can. Maybe Yoongi hyung will help you."

I nodded and stood up. "You go get some blankets and I'll get the chairs, alright?" Seyoon smiled and ran to get all the blankets he could.