Drowning

Chapter 37:" I drive at a reasonable pace."

Leah's P.O.V.

The next morning Noah, Alex and I made our way toward school. I really don't have enough energy for this right now. The only thing keeping me awake is Noah's hand on my thigh as we drive to school. I didn't get enough sleep last night, because all I kept on thinking about was Noah. I like him a lot and I just want to be with him but I can't help think that it's too soon.

I mean, Thomas and I broke up just a few days ago.

I am brought back to reality by Noah squeezing my thigh with a weird look on his face. He is leaning close toward me and his left eyebrow is lifted. I turn my head and look at him with wide eyes.

"Are you okay, Sailor?" Noah's voice reaches me and the sound soothes me already.

I shake my head a little before locking eyes with him again," I'm fine, thank you."

I smile at him as I reach for his hand. I glance outside the car and realize that we're parked in the school's parking lot. I turn back toward Noah looking at me amused.

"How fast did you drive?"

Noah chuckles at my expression shaking his head. With a smile on his face he says," I drive at a reasonable pace. You just dosed off."

My mouth formed an 'o' shape as I realize what happened.

"Um... listen I wanted to ask you something." Noah says looking down nervously. He bites his bottom lip waiting for a reply. I furrow my eyebrows at his expression and nervousness.

Noah never gets nervous. This is the first time I've seen him nervous.

"Noah, you can ask me anything." I say earning a small smile from his gorgeous face. His smile makes a small smile appear on my face. Noah swallows nervously before connecting our eyes again.

"I would like it of you would be my date at my cousin's wedding." He holds my eyes captive as I feel my heart drop to my feet.

Okay, I know that it's stupid to be nervous about this but come on. If I go I'll meet Noah's whole family and what if they don't like me. What if I make a fool of myself? What if Noah decides he doesn't want me anymore after the wedding? What if-

"Sailor? Are you okay?" Noah questions looking worried. He squeezes my hand as a sign of reassurance. I sigh at the feeling.

"I- I don't know. Can you give me a day or two to decide?" I question with pleading eyes. Noah smiles but I see worry and hurt in his eyes and that makes me feel like shit.

God, I hate myself sometimes.

"Yeah. That's fine." Noah says squeezing my hand again before exiting the car. I sigh and close my eyes as I lean my head back on the car seat.

Noah opens the passenger door and extends a hand toward me. I gently grasp his hand and I exit the car. When I descend we make eye contact and my heart drops. I can see Noah trying to mask his hurt that I caused. But ever since I spend more time with him I see right through it. I see the pain and hurt in his green eyes. And that makes me so angry at myself.

"I'm scared." I whisper so that only Noah can hear. At the sound of my voice his eyebrows furrow and he grabs my hands, squeezing them.

"Why?" he simply questions and it's that question I don't know how to answer.

"What if they don't like me?" I break our eye contact and look down toward my black boots. Noah sighs and I suddenly feel his fingers under my chin. He gently lifts my face so that I'm looking at him again. His expression is weird. I don't know what this expression means. The only expression I can't read and can't see through.