Fake Smiles and Cut Wrists (a Chandler Riggs fan fiction)

Chapter 28

TRIGGER WARNING (Also this is after they painted his room, it's blue *shrug*)

Flashback (3rd person POV)

"Look dad!" Six year old Chandler said running into the living room, holding a family portrait he drew. "Hey, buddy what is it?" William asked, standing up from his spot on the couch. Chandler outstretched his arms to show his dad the picture he drew.

"Wow! That's awesome! Why don't you go show your mom?" William asked him. Chandler looked down. "I-I think she's mad at me." He said, barely over a whisper. "Why would you think that?" William asked.

"I spilled Apple juice in her car." Chandler admitted. William laughed, thinking something was actually wrong at first. "And did she say she was mad at you?" William asked Chandler. "W-well no but still--" Chandler started but William cut him off.

"She's not mad at you, son. Kids make mistakes. She knows that."

End of flashback

Chandler's POV
"Kids make mistakes." I wonder if he forgot that the day he started to drink. Like no matter how old I was, I was to follow one rule. Stay out of his way. And it didn't matter how many mistakes I made, it didn't even matter if I made one at all.

He'd always come up with something.

This is what I choose to think about at 2:46 am, while I'm awake and Parker and Zay are all passed out on air mattresses. Laura and Ava are in Payton's room.

I'm tired of having these dreams. Why do they have to be about Keith of all people?

What he did, has that ever happened to other people? I just don't get it. When they were cutting me with knives or punching me in the face it still didn't scare me near as bad as what he did.

And the worst part is, I can't even tell anybody. They would see me as more of a freak than I already am. Maybe Laura knows, he was gonna do it again before he shot her. Maybe she knows if other people have went through that.

I'm not gonna ask her, I don't even wanna think about it anymore.

I don't wanna think about anything anymore. Like how two loving people who went to church and cared about everyone can just stop being good, happy people.

How a man who worked hard for everything he had can just come home one day and drink until he can barely stand.

And for the first time, I'm realizing that what they did wasn't okay. They always told me I deserved it, and for the first time I don't believe them. Maybe I did, but no one can convince me a seven year old who just wanted to show his dad a sticker deserved to be locked in a closet for 3 days.

I don't even think my parents are convinced of that, now that they're forced to be in their right minds.

I'm thinking too much. I decide there's no point in trying to sleep so I sit up.

"Chandler?" I suddenly heard Zay ask. Oh no. What's he doing awake?

I quickly wiped the tears off my cheeks that I didn't even realize were there. "Y-yeah?" I whispered. Zay stood up and sat on the bed beside me.

"What are you doing up?" He asked me quietly. "I-I could ask you the same question." I said, but my voice was shaky.

I could tell he was gonna know somethings up.

"You sound like you've been crying, are you okay?" He asks me. Crap. I was hoping he wouldn't ask me that.

I'm terrible at lying. "Y-yeah I'm fine. Just go back to sleep." I said, trying to sound confident. It didn't really work.