matty healy, falling in love over night

days we all wish stayed the same

30th of april - 30 days until tour

i'd been at matty and george's for six days now. every day was perfect, we laughed, we smoked, we drank, we cried. it was 3 am now, and we were sat in the living room, absolutely wasted. adam was with carly, they went to a posh restaurant tonight and ross was at his parents. i sat between my boys, kissing matty slowly. everything was perfect.
"paris is our first stop" matty said
"i love paris, i've never been but i know i'm gonna love it"
"it's perfect for you gracey" chimed in george
"romantic and beautiful" matty said kissing my forehead
"we should sleep, it's three and we all have to face the world tomorrow. me and george have meetings about tour and you miss, sadly have to go home" i pouted
"i know i know, let's go to bed"
"night georgie" i called out
me and matty had started sleeping in his bed together, nothing had happened yet. it just wasn't the right time. we got into the warm sheets and his arms found their way around my body, kissed the back of my head before numbing words i didn't quite hear.
"what?" i asked
"mmh" he replied. completely out of it. idiot.

10 am

i woke before matty for once, i studied his face. very freckle and line. he was so beautiful. i felt the world spinning beneath me and i knew i couldn't be the same, he had something in him that made me want to me more. i couldn't loose him again. i had to tell him my feelings. just as i was about to he woke up. rubbing his eyes, he saw me and smiled
"morning"
"morning" i couldn't take my eyes off his curly hair and the way his smile stretched
"tea?" i asked
"yes please baby" he said, everything just came so naturally with us. like honey.
"on it" i whispered getting out of bed and walking barefooted to the kitchen, closing his door quietly behind me. i put the kettle on and got out two cups. while the kettle was boiling i knocked on george's door,
"georgie?" i asked, i heard mumbling and sniffling from behind the door
"george?" i asked again, more sniffling
"i'm coming in george" i said pushing the door ajar to see him say on the edge of his bed with lia's old bracelet in his hand. it was one she left at my house, george always use to mess with it so when she passed i mailed it to him, i had no idea he still had it.
"i miss her gracey" he said, tears everywhere, drool leaking from his open mouth. i day beside him and stroked his hair
"i know"
"it h-hurts" he said stumbling over his words due to all the tears and heavy breathing
"i know george"
"and i just f-feel there's a h-h-hole"
"i think we just have to wait. eventually it will hurt less"
"she deserved more"
"she did georgie" he wiped his eyes before clearing his throat
"sorry i know she was your bestfriend grace"
i shrugged
"it's okay i like talking about her" he half smiled and we heard the kettle click
"want a tea?" he nodded,
"i got you" i said
"and i got you" he replied holding my hand.
"thankyou" he added
"anytime george" as i got up to make the tea i'd promised matty and now george. i got out a third cup and was halfway through pouring the tea when matty appeared beside me, dressed in grey sweatpants and no top.
"you okay?"
"i'm fine, just george needed a talk" matty nodded
"he doesn't sleep too well, he hides it well but he's hurting"
"so am i matty"
"i know and i wish i could take it away"
i turned to face him, his eyes clouded with sadness,
"it isn't your fault, you've helped more than you'll ever know" i said resting my head on his sturdy shoulders.
"let me take his tea" i picked up the cup and walked over to his door, he appeared and took the cup.
"good luck with your meeting today boys, you're gonna smash it"
"we better start getting ready george" matty said as they both went to get ready.

an hour later i walked them to mattys car
"i'll leave in 30 minutes i just need to shower"
"take your time" matty said
"goodluck boys" they both looked so anxious
"you got this. and george? lia would be so proud" his eyes lit up and he smiled, matty nodded at me. i knew george missed her as much as me and he needed that reassurance.
as they drove off i waved. my boys making it big

i headed back up to the apartment, and as soon as i was inside i closed the door. walking to the shower i got a big fluffy towel ready. it was the first time i'd been alone in days. it was nice but also scary. as i stepped into the hot shower i started to cry. but weirdly because i was happy. i didn't think i'd feel happiness again. less than two weeks ago i was huddled in my room unable to leave. my boys were back and i was returning. slowly but surely.
as i turned off the shower i stepped out, the cold air hitting me. i wrapped the towel around me before heading to my bag to root through for some clothes. in the end i picked some blue ripped jeans, my nike air force and one of mattys black sweatshirts from his wardrobe. i wandered to the living room, tidying the bottles away and taking the bins out. i found a piece of paper and scribbled

thankyou for having me! i love you both so stay safe and don't drink too much! see u soon losers xxx - grace

with that i sat on the sofa and texted kian

new message to: kian

grace: hey ki i'm ready to leave if that's okay x
kian: setting off!
grace: missed u, see u soon x
kian: love you!

in ten minutes my brother was outside. i locked the door and gave the key to leon the doorman. i waved goodbye. getting in the car kian smiled at me.
"what?" i said laughing
"you look happy, lighter" i beamed at him, i felt it
"thankyou for getting me"
"anytime gracey"
the rest of the drive we spent singing to old songs and laughing. i told him all the fun i'd had and he seemed so overjoyed to know i was on the mend. everything was falling into place