Chara x Reader

Square One (33)

Since that day a short while ago, I hadn't heard a word. Although unmotivated, I tried my hardest to do basic things, like washing my face and brushing my teeth. Even still, I found myself trudging to school, and somehow it appeared I wouldn't be late for once.

I didn't forget that she was in my class, and what used to be a blessing made me wary. I don't think she'll even come in, to be honest. I shrugged my shoulders. Let's just leave it to the higher forces, why don't we, because I don't know what else I can do for now.

On the way in I smiled and waved at a few people I knew. I was always more of the reserved type, and in the past year I've been even more tame, but it's not like I'm not confident. I can be, and I will be.

I arrived at my locker and organised my things for the day. Should I be, though? Won't it just look weird if my behaviour is different all of a sudden? Especially since I'm not with my darling girlfriend. I don't fancy being the talk of the day again, and I definitely don't want people to think that I'm a loner now, trying to desperately make some new friends. I find that smiling at people and introducing yourself doesn't really work when you've been sitting in the same class as them for 6 years, and seen some of them go through a teenage crisis at that.

Before fully closing my locker, I noticed Angel chatting to a guy by the homeroom door, and instinctively hid. I laughed to myself, unsure of why I needed to hide. Perhaps this really is the end of the world? I guess some things just change. I closed my locker door and headed over. I gave her a few short glances in order to say hello if she caught my gaze, but she was way too focused on her own conversation, fiddling with her hair and leaning on the door. I just walked straight past them and entered the class.

Even though I shouted to myself in my head to not be so obvious, my eyes were already fixed on one place and one place alone. That seat at the back. And there I saw... Absolutely nothing.

...Right. Should've been obvious. I briefly looked around whilst taking my own seat, bringing out some books and essentials. I pretended to look as if I was organising myself, however, I was just wasting time. There's nothing much for me to do... I'm not really worth anything by myself. I'm just...

"Super prepared, aren't you?"

I looked up at one of my classmates, who was passing by, and smiled. "Exams are coming, so I should at least try to look like I'm learning." I joked.

She giggled and walked off, leaving me to my own devices once more.

20 minutes passed by pretty painfully, and class finally started. My mind still wandered the same as most days, just now, it was a bad case of daydreaming and not of the things that I actually had in my grasp. I grumpily continued to write down notes. There's no point waiting for anything I can't control. Let me just try force my brain to focus on studying and whatever else I need to do.

~

Two lessons went by and it was break time. Slowly, I walked up to an unoccupied window and took a look outside. Younger years began to storm into the playground, so I didn't bother going there. Plenty of people in my year and the year below were roaming the corridors, however, so I just joined the crowd. I couldn't see anyone I knew moderately well, so I peeked at my watch to see how long I'd hold out for. I winced. It's only been one minute. One freaking minute. I screamed silently in my head. I'm forcing myself not to say it, but there's nothing else on my mind! I... just... want...

I broke off from the crowd and sat down on a little bench, slightly away from a few other random people. They were chatting and doing work, so I just went on my phone and covered it with my bag. I'm just fine by myself, and my phone. Surely, I've been through more than anyone else here has been, it'd just be embarrassing if I couldn't help hole up a few emotions whenever the time came.