Fighting Love

♦Chapter Ten

Trust is as fragile as glass

TRISA'S POV

I stirred in my sleep, coming conscious of a  hammering headache. I remembered little of the night or when I went to the dorms after the party. I didn't recall anything. My body came alive when I felt someone's arms snaking around my waist, "Get off me." Frightened, I hit the person in the chest.

"What the hell, Trisa?" Troy's voice filled the room and his head emerged from under the covers. "What was that for?" 

I climbed over him and fell on the cold floor. I shoved Troy's hand aside when he tried to help me up. How could he take advantage of me like that? He knew I was drunk, and he still took my innocence. I couldn't even remember if it was a wonderful experience, and it wasn't special at all. "I hate you! Leave me alone!"

"What did I do?" 

"You tell me, you jerk!" I hit him again and again until he held my hands together up to my chest. "Are you that desperate? You knew I was drunk, and you still stuck your stupid dick in me," I sniffled. I hated him. Every time Im about to let someone in, they hurt me and show me why I shouldn't open up. 

"WHAT," His eyes widened. "You think I fucked you?" Troy let out a throaty laugh that made my blood boil.

"You stole my virginity, I fucking hate you!" I burst into another fit of tears and ran to the bathroom, slamming the door behind me. How could he do that to me? Didn't he say he was trying to be on my good side? He was such a bipolar piece of shit. I didn't understand how the world works, how people could deliberately do things to hurt others. What kind of satisfaction could someone get from that? 

"Fluff, open the door, and stop overreacting." He knocked softly, banged on the door, and then stopped.

"Leave me alone." I Hit the door with my elbow as I slid down to the floor. "He's a piece of shit,"  I told myself as I failed at wiping my tears. It was no secret I'd just be another of Troy's one-night stands, another name on his list of virgins, and another thing to brag about. I dozed with my back against the door and my knees pulled up to my chest. 

I forced my eyes open, realizing I was still wearing Troy's shirt. In about a half-hour, I finished taking a shower and draped myself in my funky towel. I unlocked the door, only to find Troy had fallen asleep on the floor. I stepped over his legs and I kicked them. 

He jumped up right away, bickering again, "Fluff, wait." He followed me into the bedroom, "Just let me explain-"

"Don't call me that!" I said and pushed him away. I couldn't control myself, the rage inside me, the hatred I felt for him consumed my logical sense and I couldn't stop hitting him. It was a good thing I couldn't actually hit him hard since I was so hangover.

Unlike other times when he'd slap me hard across my face or push me or bark, Troy simply ignored my rage. He ignored it and continued talking like I wasn't trying to fight him. "Fluff... Shit, I mean Trisa," He combed a hand through his hair and dropped his shoulders. "I didn't fuck you last night. I know you hate me and I hate you too, but I fucking respect you, regardless." He sighed. "I brought you here after you stripped and pole danced in front of the whole blasted college."

I laughed at his ridiculous lie. I would never expose myself like that. My laughter soon died when I saw his serious face. It didn't seem like he was joking or lying, more like he felt pitiful.

"OH MY GOD! you're telling the truth?" I asked, hoping he was just pulling my legs. Even if I was drunk, Anna was there. She wouldn't let me do that. 

"Yeah, Trisa." He shook his head. "I put my shirt on you before you got the chance to show the world your tomatoes, though. But, what the fuck, Trisa, how could you be so reckless?"

I got lost in thought, remembering I started drinking something I had never tasted before. I didn't know they filled it with alcohol. My head felt as if someone was hammering both of my ears. It didn't help that Troy was scolding me for something I didn't even remember. He made me out to be the bad guy when it was him who slept with me without my permission.

Troy handed me an Advil and a glass of water. "Take this to feel better, drunkie." He snickered. "And I really didn't touch you."

"Then why did I wake up next to you?"

" Because you asked me to stay with you. You were cold, so I did," He replied. "I didn't touch you inappropriately. I'd never do that without your consent. I want you to be sober when I'm making you scream my name." He winked. "You didn't give me much choice either, you dragged me onto your bed."

I hissed at his remark, "You wish." I wanted to slap the smirk off of his face. Why did it look so good on him? 

"By the way, Fluff, your boobs are nice and soft." With that, he left the room. I hoped he'd keep his word about being nice to me and treating me decently but, some people never change. You can clean your ass today but it will still be an ass tomorrow and shit will always come from it.

If I wasn't so careless, none of this would've happened. All of Jess's teachings go down the drain in one night. I couldn't even tell her about it, not because I felt ashamed but because I didn't know what to say or even what happened. I knew I shouldn't allow anyone to pour my drink at a party, or to drink the punch because it's almost always spiked. Yet, I still let it happen. My consequences, I couldn't remember a thing that happened, and I lost my innocence to the one person who didn't deserve it.

I lost my virginity and all that's left is a blank space where the beautiful memory should be.

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