Conundrum | JENLISA (COMPLETED)

Chapter Eleven

When did I start denying my own feelings?

January 01, 2019

After waking up to that kind of news, I didn't know what to do. I didn't see how they reacted or if they even moved from their beds. I just stared at my phone, contemplating if I should read the whole article.

For almost I didn't know how long, I stared at nothing. My heart was still aching. And I was clueless on the reason why.

Maybe it's aching for Jennie? For what I heard last night? For the band's reputation? In fear of disbandment?

No. No, Lisa. The last two reasons were selfish and not true at all.

How dare you think that way when your friend is probably scared out of her wits right now?

With a heavy heart, I decided to read the article. They provided images and proofs about the secret dates and the gifts from each other. With every proof and picture, my heart got heavier and heavier.

How was Jennie coping with this? How did she manage to hide this to us for this long?

I realized that we really can't know everything about a single person, no matter how hard you try. We try to dig deeper and deeper, pouring everything we have on the process but we only manage to scrape the surface of one's self and life.

The secrets of one single person is infinite, swirling inside their souls, wrapping themselves in one's DNA, which made it harder to know and find out

I tried to be as open as I am to them but I guess they can't do the same. I smiled bitterly.

A family shouldn't keep secrets, huh?

However, I also realized that Dispatch is such a shitty company. Invading personal matters, publishing every dirt and grime they see on an idol and call falling inlove a scandal.

Falling inlove?

My heart dropped at the thought. Jennie is fucking inlove and her, probably first relationship was announced to the whole world a few hours ago.

Oh gods, no. No time for blaming Jennie.

I woke from my daydream and dashed outside. I didn't care if I didn't wash my face or brushed my teeth.

I saw Jisoo and Chaeyoung infront of the television, just staring at the black and dead screen.

"Hey..."

"Hey." They both said in unison. I sat on the single couch adjacent to them and stared at the television too.

"Where's Jennie?" I asked the two who probably looked as disheveled as me.

"Probably called by YG." Chaeng averted her gaze to her hands but I noticed that there were tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

Jisoo released a deep breath before turning to us, "I'm guessing we all read the same news?"

We nodded forlornly, "Yeah. Yeah, I guess we did."

"Did any of you know- like... about this?" Chaeng whispered.

I shook my head then turned towards Jennie's bedroom door. "No. Did you?"

They both shook their heads, "No. But I thought something was up since she disappeared most of the time."

Jisoo rested her head on the couch then closed her eyes. "I noticed that too but I thought it was for her Solo promotion or something."

We heard the front door open and saw Jennie emerge from it. Her sad eyes turned confused for a moment before eyeing us with a look of amazement.