A Rant-Worthy World

21) Growing up with Indian/Asian parents

First thing's first, I just want to make this VERY clear: I am not saying that all Indian/Asian parents are like this but many of them are like this.

A couple of more things: I'm not saying that no Western parent is like this, there will be some who do act like this and it is not exclusive to Asians. Also, I am in no way, saying that Asian parents are worse than Western parents. Asian parents are just as good as Western parents, they just have a different way of parenting.

And why is it that when people think Asian, they think Chinese? China is not the only country in Asia, people.

Get a map.

Now, onto the actual topic at hand.

1) Career choices:

Parent: You can become a doctor, dentist or an engineer.

So basically anything that sends a big fat cheque into your bank account every month. Oh and don't forget that it gives you a good reputation too.

The sad thing is that parents are quite strict about it - I have a feeling my parents aren't going to be over the moon when I finally tell them I don't want to be a doctor or an dentist.

Even sadder is that some kids go ahead with their parent's dreams against their own.

Anyways.

2) Grades:

Parent: You must get A's and A*'s in all your subjects.

Parent: You got a B?! How dare you? Now we will have to send you to tuition otherwise you will fail school and not get into medicine or engineering and then what will you become?! A cleaner?

That really is how it works majority of the time though it really depends. Thank God my parents only wanted me to pass Urdu though of course, it's A*'s and A's in all other subjects.

It's a good thing my parents never discovered the U 's (yes, I got more than one) in my Urdu papers.

Just in case you didn't know, U stands for You're dead. (Replace you with u)

3) Punishment:

Parent: You did what?!

And cue the yelling, cursing, screaming, slapping and maybe a bit more in the way of physical punishment.

The thing I noticed with Western parents is that their reactions are more... suppressed, let us say. If the Western kiddies (and teens) do something wrong, they'll get a stern lecture and a better punishment like grounding, no TV, no pocket money etc etc.

You have no idea how lucky you are, Westerners.

4) Money:

Parent: No, we need to save money.

Asian parents are good at saving, if I'm quite honest with you and they'll buy you anything you need that's for school, no matter the price tag.

When it comes to other things... Not so much.

There's a nice jacket which is cheaper than most shops?

Parent: Oh, I don't know, it's a lot of money, maybe if we keep looking, we'll find it cheaper?

(After you've begged them to buy it and they do, with much reluctance)

Parent: No, no don't take the price tag off yet, we still need to see if it's worth the money. I mean, £30? I don't know, it seems like a bit too much.

Story of my life.

5) Visiting the old country:

Parent: we have to go, we need to see all your relatives again even though you've already seen them once a year, every yea of your life. It'll be fun, you'll enjoy it.

Then when you actually get there -

Grandma/cousin/aunt/annoying relative: what is this?! You wear Western clothes and you don't speak good (insert native language here)?! You don't like cleaning or cooking?! What kind of person are you?!

Shut the fuck up, what I do is none of your business.

That is what I say in my head. On the outside I have to appear remorseful...

6) "The talk"

Parent: ...

The parent, in this case, doesn't say anything. You don't ever talk about that kind of thing in these parts. Ever.

You don't even pop the question. That's the golden yet unwritten rule here.

I don't know how they expect you to know all that stuff but they're certainly not the ones to tell you - hell, it makes my skin crawl just thinking of ever having that talk with my parents.

7) The L word is never dropped. Not even by accident.

Parent: Bye.

It doesn't matter what the scenario is, whether you're off to college and you won't see them for 3 months or whether you're going to school and you'll see them in 6 hours - you NEVER say "I love you".

Ever.

For some of you Westerners out there, you probably say "I love you" as you're running out the door to school and kiss and hug your parents on a regular basis.

Moi? Never said or heard I love you from them, last time I hugged my mum was 3 years ago and it was incredibly awkward (okay, I'm the one who made it awkward) but she knows not to do it again and never hugged my dad.

We just don't do that kind of thing here.

Well, times are changing so more asian parents do that (which explains why my uncles and grandad have hugged me) but for the oldies... Well, you know the drill.

8) High expectations in general:

In general, indian parents expect their daughters to be absolutely beautiful (tall, skinny, fair skin etc), be brilliant at cooking and cleaning, be a doctor and be academically bright.

For the sons, they need to be absolutely handsome, be a doctor and be academically bright.

They all also need to swim in money.

Some parents will do anything to get their kids to meet their expectations whether it's through medicine, verbal abuse, comparing you to others etc.

9) A few other things:

No pocket money - chores are done for free and pocket money doesn't exist.

No social life - this mostly applies if you're a girl because they think England is as dangerous as India.

They care a lot about what other people think - even though extended family don't exist in here.

I think that's it for now. But do keep in mind people that not all asian parents are like this as aforementioned and Asian/indian parents really aren't bad - they work their socks off so we can have a good life.

If any of you have any others you'd like to add, just comment below. Vote if you liked this... chapter I suppose since its not really a rant.

Later folks

~Izzy