INDEFINITE ✔️✔️

∆ 28. I CAN'T ∆

Seokjin's

The drive on the way to the hospital was silent. None of us want to talk about anything else. To be honest, I wanted to hold him just like before, but that would be a reason for him to think low of me. I wouldn't want to look like someone who is still thirsting for him even after all these years. Even if I am, I shouldn't.

The world that we are in right now is different. He has a daughter, I have my son, if I was to risk it and chase after him again, I can't. Yoongi will be in danger, Jungkook and Taehyung's marriage will be broken, the children will have a terrible childhood just because I became selfish. I can't.

I will just do the same thing like before, loving him silently.

"Taehyung, we're here."

I pulled up and we walked out of the car. My mind was racing. How can I tell my son about his father? How can I explain the situation? I'm thinking too much that I bumped myself on the rearview mirror.

"Hyung, are you okay?"

"I'm fine. I'm just thinking about something." I composed my self again and started walking.

"It's okay hyung , I know what you're thinking. Don't stress yourself too much on how you will introduce me to our son. Just let me see him for now, the truth can come out later. I won't pressure you. What's important is that he's safe."

What he said gave me the relief. The Taehyung that is with me now is more matured and has a wide understanding, Jungkook did a great job on making him the man that he is today.

Even if Jungkook is so possessive over Taehyung, just like the last time I saw him, there is no doubt that he brought out the best in Taehyung. The one which I can't do.

Being this close to him again makes me horrified in a way that I'm getting scared of how my heart will be after this. I can't always rely on Yoongi for mental support, he has gone through a lot because of me.

"Hyung, how is our son like?"

While walking, he asked me that question. Only if he knew his son is just like him.

"He's a typical kid. Always wants to play and eat. His personality, well, he got that from you. Everything. I don't understand how that happened seven years you're not with us, don't get me wrong, I'm not mad at you, you're not with us but you both are the exact same thing. Both are impatient, loves to eat hamburgers and pizzas, loves purple and everything about you."

And most of all, I love both of you. But I won't ever say that! "He's got your eyes and nose too. When he accepts you as his father, both of you will hit it off real good."

We both talked about how our son grew up. I'm really surprised how smooth this is going. All these years I imagine our "reunion" to be full of tears and blaming each other because of our misery, but it's the opposite. Yes we're awkward but it's better than being angry at each other.

We finally reached the door of our son's room. He should be asleep by now since it's 8 o'clock in the evening. I twisted the knob and I'm right Yoongi was there sitting beside my son and looked at me when we entered the room.

"Hey, babe."

====

Taehyung's

"Hey, babe."

Jin hyung's husband greeted him and when his eyes landed on me he just smiled at me. I looked at my son, trying to avoid the sweet scene in front of me. Years after years still the same effect. I still don't want anyone other than me hold him, but just like what I always think of, I can't. I don't have the right to do so.

"Can I go near him?"

"Of course, you can. By the way, Jin, our son already knows that his Dad is coming. I explained it to him. Don't stress too much."

The man stretched out his hand, "I'm Yoongi, nice to meet you."

"Taehyung. Thank you."

"No problem. I'll leave the two of you. I'll go home for now." He stood up and I saw how Jin hyung didn't want him to leave and prevented him. That stings, really.

He has moved on and I'm no longer a part of his life. I let them be in their world and went to my son, his weight dropped down since I last saw him in the mall. I tried touching his hair, his hands, memorizing everything about him.

"I'll leave now. Bye guys." Yoongi said.

The door closed but I still looked at my son. I wanted to cry so much, but I don't want to be weak. Crying over him means I'm giving up, he has lots of chances and all he needs is to match my genes. I may jot have a place in Jin hyung's life anymore but I'll make sure to have a spot on my son's life. I will love him like how I loved Heize and they will be the best siblings in the world.

Beomgyu stirred and slowly opened his eyes. His first saw me and smiled a little, "Hi, Dad."