When You're Broken On The Ground

Chapter 7

Glad to see you after the past decade! (Idk, I'm sorry...)

Trigger Warnings: attempted suicides (hanging, medication, stabbing, blood loss), mentioned suicides, severe cutting, mentioned cutting, attempted murder, mentioned murder, depression, panic attacks, brief homophobic language, swearing, graphic descriptions of both suicide and cutting, self-harm.

Notes: italics are for inside their heads, underline signals which POV it is in. The changing tenses are meant to be there, I'll explain it at the end of the next chapter.

Word Count: 3217             (So I may have gone just a bit overboard....)

Please be careful, this chapter is darker than the last one. And remember, I don't promise a happy ending. Life rarely ends the way we hope for.

Virgil

Roman had called him with news of the accident as soon as he found out from his twin, and was the one who drove him to the hospital. They met Patton and Logan in the parking lot, Remy and Emile in the waiting room, and Remus and Dee after the police released them from questioning. They waited together, hugging Ms. Sanders immediately after she walked in. Once Thomas was out of surgery, she rushed to his room, only stopping to insist they come with her. 

At first, the doctors were hesitant to share the details with them in the room, but Ms. Sanders had vouched for them. She called them Thomas' brothers. Remus looked ready to cry by that point while Dee just collapsed. Logan lay him on the couch before gesturing for the doctors to start. 

He had instinctively clutched the two nearest hands to his when they described the damage, those hands which belonged to Roman, his crush, and Patton, his dad friend. The two had gone with it, squeezing the hand they had in silent support. Virgil had been able to see Emile with an arm around Ms. Sanders, Remy on her other side holding her hand. Remus was standing next to Dee's unconscious body, holding eye contact with his twin. And Logan had stood next to Patton, who had an arm wrapped around his waist and was forcing Logan to Patton's side. 

Thomas had died during surgery. Thomas. Had. Died. They restarted his heart, got him back, but still. For two minutes, Thomas had been dead. Dead.

The next day, Virgil had woken up from one the worst nightmares he had had in a long, long time and into a horrible panic attack that lasted at least an hour. In the nightmare, which pooled into his attack, Thomas was dying and he couldn't help, then his friends yelled at him for not helping, calling him a villain and useless, a waste of space. 

"Paranoid."

"Wet blanket."

"Debbie downer."

"Anxious idiot," the voices hiss.

"Villain," Roman's voice spits at him, an echo of when they first met. That one, out of them all, hurt the most. 

Tears streak his cheeks, he doesn't know when that started, he thought Roman liked him, loved him, they were dating- are dating-

"No one could ever actually care about such a pathetic creature."

"N-no, please," Virgil whispers, trying in vain to stop the voices.

"Just die already," the voices continue mercilessly. 

"You have nothing here, no one actually cares."

"The world would be so much better with you gone!"

"JUST LET THIS PAIN END!" Virgil screams.

He ties and hangs a noose, climbs onto a chair, and jumps.