It was unconscious really.
And highly unwanted.
He had done everything to stop this from happening. Tried nipping it at the bud. After all, he was rejected, not so long back by a girl, who he thought was the love of his life.
His feelings for her intense, and burning.
Because, it was the first time he had really liked someone. Like really, truly liked someone. Dreamed about her day and night. Pictured a future together.
And he really believed the feelings were reciprocated.
But alas, it was not, He was heartbroken.
He pined.
He cried.
He slugged on his days.
And then he surprised himself.
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It was the second time he got posted to the same branch.
The first time, he never ever thought about him like that. Hell, he even thought of him as someone still with boyish attitude and mannerism.
And that person being his senior.
Senior in position, not in age.
But this time, something changed.
Was it the atmosphere?
The way he talked?
Or the way he looked?
Whatever it was, it was very, very unwanted.
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He looked up at the back of that person as he followed him.
He was a very tall man. Easily distinguishable in a crowd. And come to think of it, he had a very attractive back.
"Arthit", he called.
And involuntarily, Arthit reddened a bit. He grumbled at this unwanted reaction.
"Yes?", He asked looking up, and saw Kongpob already looking at him.
His gaze direct and unwavering.
Which was never like that in the past.
And Arthit melted a little at that gaze and his heart thumped loudly.
Please God...no.
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"Yes Arthit", Kongpob answered in the phone and Arthit melted again. Something stirred inside him, and his cheeks started burning again.
He squashed those feelings.
No. No....not now....please.
But if he was very honest with himself, he liked it very much, when Kongpob called him like that.
His voice turning ever so soft whenever talking to Arthit compared with others.
And Arthit failing again, to stop it, whatever that was.
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Was he imagining it, or Kongpob really did started paying a little more attention to him?
Was he imagining it, or Kongpob's eyes were really on him whenever he talked with a close colleague of his.
Was he imagining resisting it, or he really did resist it?
The truth being, he actually wanting it.
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This heart is a strange thing.
Just not long back, it felt like dying on being rejected.
But right now, it felt very alive and excited.
Just a little of his sight, just a little of his voice, just the feeling of his presence, made it happy and thumping wildly.
Not to mention, the weird dance it did and the weird feeling accompanying it whenever Kongpob was in close proximity.
His colleagues had started noticing his slightly different behaviour towards Kongpob. And it won't do, if they catch up with everything going on with Arthit.
Those colleagues being females, and being sharply perceptive in these matters.
Specially, when Kongpob was his senior, and these feelings of his would not have a happy ending.
He sighed, why.
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Lately, one or two stray thoughts of Kongpob had started entering his thoughts whenever he was free.
The way he looked a particular time, things he spoke someday. Or just the thought about what he must be doing right now.
Kongpob was due on promotion in a few weeks. And just the thought of him going away, made him feel unhappy and bereft.
All the more reason to stop.
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It was quite by accident he saw it. Not once, but twice.
Arthit had this habit of running his hand through his hair whenever he was alone.
And then he saw Kongpob doing the same. And that too, when Kongpob kept his hair gelled.
Another time, he saw Kongpob using his left hand to move the mouse, which was the habit of Arthit.
Isn't it said, that a person copies the body language of that person he is attracted to?
Arthit felt a tinge of excitement and hope at that.
And then it happened.
Once their eyes connected, and Arthit was unable to move it away.
And it looked like, it was the same for Kongpob too. And then he smiled.
Weird feelings started again, full fledged.
Colour crept into Arthit's cheeks.
Maybe his feelings were reciprocated.
Maybe he will try again.
Maybe these things weren't unwanted at all.
----------------------------end------------------------
How was it?
