Five stages of grief; taegguk

ANGER -4-

Jungkook,

You're not dead, are you?

No, you wouldn't do that to me, would you? You're not so selfish. No, no. I don't think you'd do that. You didn't, right?

You must know how much I love you, how much adoration I hold towards you, how much the memories we share mean to me. You should be aware by now, baby. You couldn't take advantage of that, I know that. You're just as selfless as I am.

If you died now, knowing I needed you, I'd be like betraying me, right?

Your regular love confessions, the things you said to me, about me - it would all make zero sense. It's all pointless then, all gone to waste, the years I had given to you.

I know you, Jungkook, I know you better than I know myself - you wouldn't just die, not after years of trying to convince me not to kill myself. Not after succeeding.

You planted roses in my head, told me how beautiful I am to you, how much worth I hold and how walking the earth isn't a curse but a gleeful journey. You turned my life into something worth living, you did that.

You love life much more than I do, so what's this tasteless lie? Why would you die before me?

After loving me?

After being such a mesmerizing human being, after being the creator's favorite?

No, your eyes will open one day, your lungs still breathe air, I feel it. If you died, I'd know it by every intake of breath, not by a cheap phone call.

Tae