Déjà vu | Jungkook fanfiction [Completed]

2.15. Weight of blame

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

No amount of guilt

Can change the past

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

"Good morning, Miss Kim."

I bowed back to my junior with a genial smile. "Morning. Did you rest well?"

He sheepishly scratched his head, slowing down his pace as he passed me in the hallway. "Hope so. Still feels a little sleepy."

I nodded, walking away. My expression fell instantly when I entered my own office room. Switching the lights on, I paced around the room with my thumb nail in between my teeth. Biting and nibbling it anxiously, I brooded over the feeling I had yesterday night.

It seemed like everything was fine.

I may had been wrong. Stress must had taken a toll on me, giving me a false sense of dread.

I even passed out for goodness sake!

Still, the weird thing was how exhausted I became recently. Especially right after experiencing deja vus...

...Perhaps a visit to Jungah wouldn't hurt sometime later. I just hoped that it was because of stress and nothing else.

Sighing heavily, I dragged my feet to the desk and sat down behind my computer before switching it on.

My phone suddenly vibrated on the desk when I put it out, and I saw Jimin on the caller ID. For what reason could he possibly call me this early in the morning.

Don't tell me...

Quickly taking it, I whispered a little too frightened, "Yes...?"

"Ina, can you come to Ringwanderung hospital right now?

My breath hitched. "W-What happened?"

"It's Kangmin. He's freaking out here that you pushed Soyeon to her death and stuff. Soyeon was found in a critical condition a few hours ago and is in the ICU here..."

My whole body shuddered as if someone just poured a bucket of cold water on me. A bucket of guilt and regret. It was indeed a deja vu that I felt yesterday...

"Please..."

...and I had killed her... not heeding enough attention to the signs...

"Oh my god," I whispered hoarsely in disbelief before ending the call and shot up from my seat before running out of my office.

The calls of my name were a hushed noise and the buildings and walls I passed were just a blur of colors. I couldn't remember how I ended up at the same bench Kangmin and Jimin were sitting on. I wasn't able to get out of the initial shock... Not until Kangmin started yelling at me.

He was no less than furious. His eyes were bloodshot. His lips were colorless and parched. His face was pale and twisted in sheer anger. The only thing that looked out of place were the tears in his eyes he kept wiping away.

"Ina," the blue haired man started with a strangled voice and stood up to take a look at me. I didn't dare raise my gaze when he stepped up to me. "Do you have anything to say to me?"

I never told him anything so how could I do spill everything right then and there? And I didn't trust my voice, either.

"I should've stopped her while I still could," he scoffed, planting his hands on his hips. "Even if she said she couldn't sleep until the real culprits were captured, I should've stopped her! I should've known that they would come after her. I should've known that she would put herself in danger like that."

I bit my lips until the skin ripped and clenched the material of my pants with trembling hands. "I... I'm sorry..."

"Soyeon was stupid to do that but you are, too! Why are you putting yourself and everyone around you in danger, Ina?"

I shut my eyes as the weight of the lives I had lost came crashing down on me. All the people suddenly left me and I didn't even know the reason they all had fallen victims. Where did it all go wrong? I didn't know anything but I knew for sure that I wasn't going to leave them like that.

"I only want justice to everyone's deaths..." It was too unfair.

Silence engulfed us for longer than I liked. If only I acted accordingly when I experienced deja vu, we wouldn't be sitting outside of the ICU like this.

It was all my fault.

I pushed Soyeon to her death as he said.

Kangmin suddenly fell to the floor, sobbing in his hands. The bloodstains on his arms were only visible to me now, eliciting a silent gasp from me. He must had carried her here because he didn't have any injuries on himself.

Before I could extend a hand to him after a moment of hesitation, Jimin sat on the floor beside him and ran a hand down his brother's back in an effort to comfort him. The hallway echoed and quivered with each sniffle and cough.

No matter how much guilt coursed through my veins and scalded my bones... I couldn't change the past.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Author's note:

Did you miss me? :')

(Probably not ;-;)

Watch out for double update. It's been so long 😭