Chapter 23 - "I Want To Leave Him"

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When I woke up, I found myself lying on the bed, on the giant's bed. This meant that I was back at the apartment, and not at the warehouse with Noel and his crew. Everything that had happened came crashing down on me. A sob threatened to come out, but I held it in. I didn't want to alert the giant, wherever he was in the apartment, that I was awake. I was happy that I had woken up alone in bed, because I wasn't ready to see the giant, I needed sometime alone to recollect my thoughts and process all that had happened. The sun shining through the curtains indicated that it was the next day – in mid day. Whatever those pills were that Xolile had given to me had really knocked me out which I was glad about because without them I don't think I would've been able to fall asleep last night. I sighed. I just realized that I had missed my classes today. I guess I will have call in sick at work, because I couldn't work today with everything that had happened. I tried to sit up, but an excruciating pain I felt coming from my lower abdomen didn't allow me to. I tried to control the cry of pain that wanted to come out of mouth but my efforts proved unsuccessful. I heard hurried footsteps heading my way. I sighed in defeat. I guess I wouldn't be able to avoid the confrontation that I was going to have with the giant. He stood by the doorway and just looked at me. A lot of emotions were reflected in those eyes of his, and the most prominent ones were regret and guilt - a lot of regret and guilt. I looked away from him. I didn't want to be manipulated by what was reflected in his eyes causing me to forgive him. This time I was afraid that I couldn't forgive what was done to me so easily. Actually I didn't know if I could even forgive him at all. I almost died yesterday people. I had a gun pressed against my head and stomach, and don't get me started on the pain I was feeling in my stomach...in my lower abdomen region. I could still feel how those punches felt when they were rained on my stomach. The pain I felt was out of this world. The cherry on top was the fact that I almost got raped by those sick bastards. If the giant and his friends hadn't arrived in time, we would've been talking about another story now. Even though I wasn't raped, the emotional trauma I felt when I thought I was going to be raped was enough to leave a scar. What hurt the most was that this was the giant's fault. His dirty dealings ended up biting me in the ass. I had to get out of this relationship before another one of his enemies tried to get to him through me. I really couldn't deal with all of this on top of everything else that was going on with him. I wasn't strong enough. It was too much.

Zano: "I'm so sorry Busi." He apologized in a gruff voice after a while. I just shook my head and blinked back the tears that were threatening to spill out. I wouldn't look at him. Nope, I just couldn't..."I'm so sorry." He apologized again. His voice was filled with remorse and guilt.

Me: "I don't want your sorry Zanoxolo." I told him hoarsely. I forgot that my voice was practically gone. My throat was painful actually. I cleared my throat.

Zano: "I swear on my life that nothing like this will ever happen to you again." He promised. I swallowed.

Me: "I don't want your promises either." I tried to insert heat in my voice but my voice wasn't cooperating with me..."and you're right, nothing like this will ever happen to me again, because I'm leaving you Zanoxolo. I-I can't be with you." I told him choking up. He inhaled sharply. I heard him coming close to the bed. I held my breath.

Zano: "Don't say that to me please." He begged gruffly. Oh my gosh! I've never thought I would ever hear the giant beg for something. I couldn't soften my heart though, no matter what, even though this was also hurting me. I mean I liked this man, a lot.

Me: "No Zano. Being in your life put my life at risk literally. I nearly died yesterday. Those bastards were even ready to rape me!" I told him angrily with tears spilling out of my eyes.

Zano: "I got there in time Busi." He argued.

Me: "And what would've happened if you didn't Zanoxolo? Tell me?" I asked him. I was met with silence. I looked at him. My heart squeeze painfully with what I saw on his face. He looked so miserable and in pain people. Damn him. I hardened my heart..."the life that you're living isn't meant for a person like me Zanoxolo. I will never be fine with being in a relationship with a drug lord or whatever you call yourself-."

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