three years ago
~hero's point of view;
"no, it's fine" i mumble.
my mom has just lost her job, meaning i will have to start working more shifts at the diner. my family don't have much money, since my dad left - we don't have much,
i mean we do have a fancy house, my mom and i have working cars, the things in my room are "expensive" but the only reason i have any of that is because of my dad, he brought it all. he was in a gang, a drug dealer. my mom was okay with it for some stupid reason and that was because she loved him - they broke up when the house got robbed, mom couldn't take it anymore so they broke up. they were never married so i guess it saves them both a ton of money for the divorce.
"are you sure it's okay" my mom asks again
"yes, its fine" i reply and drag myself up the stairs to my
bedroom. i'm not sure how i'm going to cope, with more shifts at work and then with school on top. i'm going to try though because i need to help provide for my mom and for jamie, as much as i love jamie; he is so expensive and i just can't.
i pick my phone up from my desk and text josephine, she's the only person who can make me feel slightly better about this shitty situation. i haven't seen her in a while, we're on fall break - i've been working everyday this past week, next week i'll be working my ass off too and the only time i can see her is at night and if i'm working more now - i'll probably take night shifts too, i would usually be too tired to go out. i would go from school to work, and then i'd go home and sleep - i don't know where seeing jo fits into that but it will have to.
hero; good evening my beautiful girl
josephine; hi :)
josephine; are you okay?
josephine; i miss you
hero; no i'm not
hero; i miss you too. i'm sorry
josephine; baby don't apologise, i understand you need to work and i understand that when you get home from work you are too tired to see me or text me and that's okay. i know that you need to work and work is important, i'm always here. please don't apologise
hero; thank you:(
josephine; why're you not okay? you need to talk?
hero; my mom lost her job and that means i have to work longer hours until my mom finds a new job
hero; i might get another job
josephine; oh
hero; i'm a mess
hero; i worked from 7am to 5pm with a 5 minute break
hero; tomorrow i'm working 8 to 8
josephine; i could ask my mom
josephine; if she has any jobs going, she owns stores remember - i can ask if she's got any jobs spare for any of the stores nearby?
hero; jo you don't have to
josephine; i want to help, i don't like it when you're stressed.
hero; i'll try and find some time to come and see you sometime during the week
hero; how was your girls day
josephine; shit, it was only supposed to be me and caroline but then the others turned up but oh well i don't really care
hero; aw that's rubbish
hero; i wish we could just run away and forget all of our problems, it would be us against the world
josephine; i wish
hero; sometimes i wonder why my mother and father decided it was a good idea to move to the us
hero; don't get me wrong, i love it here but that's only because i met you but like they were doing so well for
themselves there. why did they have to move here?
josephine; yeah i get you
hero; my back is so sore
josephine; have you tried icing it
hero; yea
josephine; is it too late for me to come over?
hero; my mom won't mind
josephine; are you sure? i don't want to intrude
hero; shut up and get your ass here
josephine; i'm on my way x
hero; drive safe baby
josephine is cuddled into me, she tried to give me a back massage but it didn't work - she ended up hurting me and she didn't want to hurt me more. her head is rested on my chest and my arms are rested on her waist. i love this girl so much, i don't want to lose her.
"i'm sorry" i say, tucking a stray piece jo's hair behind her ear
"for what" she questions, i can tell by her voice that she's falling asleep,
"for everything"
jo doesn't say anything, she just pulls the duvet up to her shoulders and turns her body around - adjusting her body to fit with mine.
i look down at josephine and her eyes are closed, she looks so peaceful.
"i'm sorry that i'm a mess, i love you. please don't leave me" i mumble and lean down to kiss her forehead. i close my eyes and slowly feel myself falling asleep.
