𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚕𝚎𝚢 𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚝𝚜

My Boyfriend is an Idiot Sometimes

Requested by @Eeyore04

*Peter's POV*

If I'm being honest, I'm not really sure if my teacher is supposed to have the head of Barry the Bee.

"Peter, is there something funny you would like to share with the class?" my teacher, Mrs. Warren, asked.

I just chuckled to my self. "Ya like jazzzzzzzz?" I slightly slurred.

Mrs. Warren just looked at me exasperatedly while the rest of the class silently snickered. She flew over to my desk-or maybe those wings aren't real-and checked my eyes and forehead. "Jesus Christ, Peter. You're burning up. Go to the nurse," she dismissed.

"Yes, ma'am," I said, walking towards the door, but instead face planting into something.

"Peter...that's a window..."

§

"I...um, Peter, I'm going to have to call a parent or guardian to pick you up. Your temperature is at 113 degrees," the nurse said worriedly, eyeing me.

"Pfffft, I don't even have any parents," I laughed, breaking into hysterics.

But the nurse just stared at me blankly.

"Okayyyy, you can call Missir Stark. His number is 302...uh-wait. He gave me this buttoooon. Look its purple! And when you press it..."

The nurse looked at me, partially concerned and partially confused as to what we were waiting for. Suddenly, I heard the faint whirring of repulsors.

"Aha! You hear that Mrs. Nurse ma'am?"

Then, Mr. Stark came bursting through the door, his suit disassembling. "What's up, kid? Who do I have to send Tasha after?"

While the nurse looked like she was about to go into shock, I just clapped my hands and jumped up and down. "Whoooo! Mr. Stark, guess what? I have a feeeever. But now I have to miss calculus, which is my favorite class. Although I-" Mr. Stark slapped his hand over my mouth and conferred with the nurse.

"Okay, kid. You're coming with me."

"Really?" I gasped. "Can we get McDonald's?"

He sighed and peered at me from the top of his sunglasses. "Sure, kid."

§

"Yes, may I get one small black coffee, ten chicken nugget meals...what does everyone else want?" Mr. Stark whispered the last part.

I handed him the list as he rubbed his temple.

"May I also get...thirteen big macs, seven quarter pounders, a double cheeseburger meal with no onions, thirty more nugget meals, ten cokes, a medium black coffee, and a strawberry banana smoothie..."

There was nothing but silence on the other line of the intercom. "Okay..."

§

"We've got food!" I yelled, running through the compound, a tired Mr. Stark trailing behind.

"For Pete's sakes...you're sick, calm down."

We sat the food down on the counter and right on cue, it was ransacked by hungry superheroes.

"Hey, darlin," Harley drawled as he came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.

I giggled. "I got chicken nuggets and a fever and I'm gonna go take over the world before Mr. String Bean can."

Harley exchanged glances with Mr. Stark.

"It's your turn, Harley."

"No. No way, old man."

"Yes. You've gotta make sure he doesn't do or say anything stupid, I did it last time."

"And how am I supposed to explain the sudden disappearance of Spider-Man."

"Spider-man is cooool," I piped up.

"Anyways, Harley. That is your job to figure out. Leave me out of it."

Harley sighed. He seems like he needs a hug.

I walked over to him and cling onto him like a koala. "Hug," I mumbled.

Harley chuckled and carried me over to where the food was.

§

*Harley's POV*

Okay...all I have to do is say that Spider-Man is out of town on a mission. And it's top secret. And I have to find someone to babysit Peter and keep an eye on him so he doesn't set anymore freezers on fire...

Yep, this should be good.

§

Reported yelled over each other, shoving microphones in my face.

"Are you Tony Stark's secret love child?"

"Why should an inexperienced kid be delivering news?"

"What is your connection to the Avengers?"

"Are you their secret boy toy?"

I made a face of disgust at the last one.

"Okay, okay," I yelled, motioning everyone to calm down. "One at a time...you, in the blue polo."

"Yes, may I ask about the whereabouts of Spider-Man?"

And like he was summoned, Peter walked into the room at that moment. Well...more like chaotically fell out of the vents.

Murmurs arose amongst the crowd as I motioned for Happy to escort Peter back to bed.

"Yes, Spider-Man is out of town on a-"

But Peter wrangled out of Happy's grip and took the microphone from me.

"Whaddya meeaan? Spider-Man isn't out of town, he's right here. Ya know, cause I'm Spider-Man," he announced, profusely giggling at the last comment.

At that, the entire room erupted into chaos and anger and confusion. All while Peter happily watched, drinking a smoothie.

My boyfriend is an idiot sometimes...that's why I love him.

A/N: Thank you so much for all of the views on this book! When I started this, I didn't expect it to get too many, as I started it for fun, but you guys have shown so much support and it means a lot.

Stay safe <3