Edge Becomes a Witch | [Half Bad Fanfiction]

Nose Ring

It's dark. Quiet. Very clammy.

I feel like me, again. Whoever that is.

I can't sleep, and I don't know if it's because of how much I am of a humiliation or because I'm sleeping with two strangers.

Ok, maybe Nathan isn't a stranger, but he doesn't feel like a friend, that's for sure. He's my father, but it's like he's more the boy's father than my father.

Luc, is his name, I think. Yup. Luc. I remember him from some of the glimpses I experienced in the milloux, the trip. I saw them through Nathan's blood because for some reason, Nathan has his memories.

I saw his brother, Jordan.

He was ugly, very tall, had very long legs, black hair, pale skin, very skinny, very lanky. He looked like Luc, only Luc isn't ugly; he just looks very tired, that's all.

I saw his father and mother, too. I can't remember how the mother looked like, but the father was ugly like Jordan. He had ice blue eyes, no hair left, and he was even bigger than Jordan. He was a giant, and the more he punched me, the bigger he got. I mean, Luc, -the more he punched Luc.

I think Luc killed his ice blue giant. He was on the bus after it happened. Or was it on a train, maybe? Can't remember, but anyway, that was when I saw Jordan, and he talked about the Phrontistery.

I dream about the glimpses a lot. All of them. Sometimes there's just one scene with one perspective, other times, there are all the different people I've been in the glimpses, all in one. Sometimes the people switch scenes with each other. One time I dreamt about Nathan's glimpses, his childhood, but Nathan was replaced with Dean. Yes, little tennis-player-cousin, Dean.

It was very strange, very surreal, and in the morning I was confused about who Nathan was at all, and I called him Dean in my head the whole day before I figured he couldn't be Dean.

Sometimes I dream about when Annalise was about to give up on her baby, on me. I see the baby sitting there on the cold airport floor, and Annalise, me, running away from it, as if it was the solution to all her problems. I don't think she feels the need to run away from me anymore, but the dreams come, and I always wake up crying after seeing the little baby crying.

Even though there are scenes a lot worse than that (for instance the one where Nathan eats a heart, -that one is revolting), the crying baby is always the only one that wakes me up.

I've only told Gabriel about my dreams about the baby. Although I'm sure Nathan knows about it as I think he's listening to my thoughts a lot, which I definitely don't approve of in case you're listening right now, Nathan! Fuck off!

Ok, I'm being paranoid, again...

Anyway, Gabriel said;

'You're confused when we tell you about your past, but at the same time, you feel the scene with the baby was you and that it truly happened. Is it like that with the other scenes where you saw old Edge?'

I thought about it, thought about the other glimpses where Edge was in them and said; 'A little, but because you've told me I'm him, and I trust you more than my stupid brain, and then I have to feel like I'm the boy in the glimpses.'

Gabriel is very interested in that. In how I trust him so much, more than the others. Nathan thinks the trust comes from the emotional memory that is still present inside me.

That's the other thing. Emotional memory. Nathan said I'm supposed to be able to feel love for those I loved, which makes sense considering I do feel a lot for Annalise, Gabriel, and Arran for seemingly no particular reason. The love I have for Poly and the others now, makes more sense to me, because it's built up, and not just there.