The Consequence ✔︎ Blake Griffin

21 ✔︎Gone Be Alright

Jubilee

This time when I woke up I was alone, and it was pitch-black. The incessant beeping and humming of my machines greeted me and reminded me of why I hated hospitals so much. Why couldn't they be more warm? More homey? It was just so sterile and cold and made me miss my home and my family even more.

Something was gnawing at my subconscious, telling me that I should be sad and mad and afraid, but I couldn't make sense of it. My brain was so foggy, and I was too exhausted to attempt to sharpen my thinking. I just knew that I needed a hug or a smile or some words of encouragement from...someone...anyone at this point.

"Baby, are you awake?"

My eyes widened, and I gasped in my bed in response to the voice I heard that I was pretty sure was Blake's. But, why would I be able to hear Blake's voice? Was this a dream?

I willed my eyes to adjust to the dark and frantically looked around before answering although I wasn't sure if he was actually near me, "Blake? Is that you?"

"Yes, Ju, they moved us into a double room, so we could be together. I needed to see you," Blake rasped, his voice indicating that he was clearly in need of some water.

I slowly sat up, turning on the lamp on my bedside table to get my bearings so I could get to Blake. There was a large, blue curtain that hung from floor to ceiling, separating me from Blake. So, I carefully stood up, grabbed my IV cart, and pulled the curtain far enough for me to see Blake and make it to the chair on the left side of his bed, which was closet to me. I turned the lamp on his bedside table on before sitting down.

"Baby, it's so good to see you," Blake rasped, his eyes barely opened and his mouth turned up into a weak smile after he turned his head toward me.

I very much appreciated being able to hear his voice, but what my eyes were seeing dominated my thoughts and emotions, and the tears came in a flash.

"Oh goodness, Blake!" I exclaimed, my hand flying to my mouth in shock as the tears rolled down my cheeks in waves.

His jaw was swollen and beginning to purple, his right arm was in a sling, and the left side of his gown was unbuttoned enough for me to see the bandaging and bruising.

"It's ok, Ju," Blake whispered, trying to comfort me.

"No! It's not ok," I choked on my tears while the images of what brought us both to this point came barreling back into my conscious, "This is my fault. You're hurt because of my stupidity. You don't deserve this, and I don't deserve you!"

I struggled to breathe while the tears continued to fall. I couldn't stand to see Blake hurt, especially when it all could have been prevented had I made different decisions. Of course Blake thinks I'm messed up. I am messed up. I wanted to fall into Blake's arms and feel his body engulf me and shield me from this evil world and all of my terrible decisions, but I couldn't even touch him or I would hurt him more.

"Being with me...it's hurt you, Blake. I can never forgive myself for that," I admitted between hiccups.

"Jubilee I w—" Blake started to say before I cut him off.

"Don't try to comfort me, Blake. You need the comforting. You need the support. You wouldn't be here if it weren't for me. You were right when you said I was messed up by all this with Trenton. I am. But I don't want you to worry about me. We've gotta get you back well!"

I stood up and walked over to the water pitcher, pouring Blake a cup to avoid having to face him again.

"Are you gonna let me get a word in, baby?" Blake asked with what sounded like a chuckle behind his words.