Angel in the Courtyard [Book 2]

Chapter 58 - Arisa

I was not expecting to find Loyal in front of my house, and I was definitely not expecting him to discuss our break-up. It was completely out of the left field for me, but I couldn't turn him away either. Not when he said he had to get things off his chest—he was clearly looking for closure and I owed it to him to listen. I would want that sort of consideration if I were in his shoes, but then he had to go and ask me why I choose to date Khaleel?

"W-What do you mean?" I stammered.

Loyal said he was having a hard time accepting our break-up, which had to mean he still liked me. Right? I couldn't help wonder if he was feeling resentful towards my relationship with his friend?

"You turned him down," he said. "You told him you didn't see him like that and because I've been so out of the loop, I want to know what happened. What made you change your mind?"

My heart throbbed. I shouldn't feel guilty about changing my mind and yet I couldn't help it. "I don't want to hurt you with my truth," I replied.

"I can take it."

I averted my eyes. "I don't want you to take it."

"Arisa..."

"Fine," I caved, glaring at him. "Right after we broke up, he asked me out. Obviously, I said no."

Loyal scoffed. "He asked you out right after we broke up? Really? That guy never ceases to amaze me."

"He was persistent...in his own annoying way," I added. "We got closer because of the whole Dobberman thing, but I kept thinking about your relationship with him, and my relationship with you. The decision to even keep him as a friend was hard because I didn't want to hurt you."

"But in the end you did keep him," he replied. "And now you're dating him."

"I don't know what you want me to say," I sighed. "I didn't run to him to forget about you. I didn't change my mind because I wanted to hurt you. I just...found someone to lean on."

Loyal's stare was intense.

I tried to hide my burning cheeks as I continued to speak. "Khaleel, he's arrogant and reckless," I complained. "He never thinks things through and always blindly follows his instincts even when they land him in a shit ton of trouble. Everyone knows he can be a real scary guy, especially when it comes to those he cares about, but despite all his flaws, he's one of the most authentic people I have ever met."

"You're in love with him."

"What?" I squealed, facing Loyal. "No—don't do that!"

"Don't do what?" Loyal feigned a laugh. "You're obviously in love with him, Arisa. Are you seriously going to deny it?"

My heart raced at every passing thought. What did he mean? Was I glowing or something? Did women glow after losing their virginity? Did they glow after fooling around with the men they l-loved?

"Why are you doing this?" I asked miserably. My voice was rising, evidently upset, and I couldn't contain my flustered expression either. "Why are you being a glutton for punishment? My feelings for Khaleel, whatever they may be—don't dig them out. Don't go looking for answers you're better off not hearing. Stop demanding the truth like you can take it. You don't have to take it. You can live in ignorance. You can live in bliss. I may not be with you anymore but I don't want to hurt—"

"The truth hurts and I'm used to taking it," Loyal interjected. "So, you don't have to protect me with your lies."

"I'm not lying."

"You're choosing not to confirm or deny."

The uncomfortable silence was enough to make me quiver. He was too perceptive.

"You should head inside," Loyal suggested. "I've kept you out here long enough."

He turned on his heel to leave but I couldn't let things end like that. "Loyal," I said, making him look back. "I don't know if what I'm feeling for Khaleel is love, so that's why you shouldn't assume—"

"It's love," he interrupted.

Goosebumps covered my entire body.

There was no hesitation in his voice, no fluctuations to indicate his nervousness, but I could see it all in his eyes. "Take it from someone who wishes they were in his shoes."