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emerson
"so..." jonah and i are sitting at two opposite ends of the sofa waiting for the other to speak first. i'm not sure where to start. this is going to be our first real conversation since everything went down.
he sighs and leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees, "whatever we decide, it's going to suck for the other. everything is so uncertain right now and we can't put him at risk, you know?"
i nod in agreement, "yeah that is true."
"it'd be a whole lot easier if the custody case had been decided already."
i frown at the mention of it and look to the side, away from him. he talks about it so casually - like it doesn't even affect him. almost like he felt he had it in the bag.
"anyway, instead of arguing for hours about this... i think it'd be best if he stays with you for now. i live with a lot of people who are constantly busy with recording and all that stuff, so i don't want to chance them getting it and giving it to noah," jonah reasons.
finally some actual logic coming from him.
"really? are you sure?"
"not really. i don't know how long it'll be before i can see him again and i hate that. but the last thing i want is possibly giving whatever this is to him so yeah, i'm sure," he pauses before continuing,
"we don't know much about covid except for that it can cause death and that's not something to mess around about. you work from home and you can give him a safe environment."
"okay then it's settled.. we just have to tell him now in a way that he'll understand," i stand up from the couch.
"wait em.. uhhh you'll facetime me and stuff right? so i can talk to him?" his voice gets softer at the end, slightly shy now that he called me em.
"of course."
he nods and we walk outside to get noah. he's running around while being chased by his crazy uncles.
his laugh fills the backyard as he runs, ducking behind jonah's legs to protect himself from the others,
"hahah you can't get me!"
jonah grins and slowly turns around to face the small boy, "uh oh i think... i think... i think i got you now!"
he starts tickling him as noah yells, "no dad, you're on my side!"
i can't help but laugh at the encounter.
"mommy help!"
"i gotcha bud," i quickly scoop him up into my arms and jonah playfully whines in defeat.
"yay we win! hahaha," noah mocks the boys and his father, sticking his tongue out.
"um.. okay whatever this is can wait. what did y'all decide to do with noah?" tate interrupts rudely, joining jonah's side and wrapping her arm around his torso.
"what is she talking about mommy?"
"good going tate," daniel rolls his eyes at her.
"shut up seavey."
jonah sighs and nods his head to the side, silently telling me to follow him.
we walk over to the outside sitting area and sit down to talk to noah. he's sitting in between us with a curious look on his face.
"little man we have something to talk to you about," jonah starts.
"what?"
"there's a sickness going around and if you are around a lot of people, it can get bad and you can catch it," i continue.
his little eyebrows furrow together in confusion.
"it's like the flu but worse. you remember when you had the flu?" jonah asks him.
he nods, "i was sick and everything hurt."
"exactly. so to keep you safe from that, we have to make sure you stay inside and healthy. you can't be around a lot of people so..." jonah trails off, not wanting to tell his son that he wouldn't be seeing him for who knows how many weekends.
"buddy you're going to be with me for a while, okay? just you and me. that way we're safe. and that means that you might not see your dad for a little bit until this sickness goes away," i try to tell him.
noah frowns, "but... what about daddy? i want him safe with us."
i glance at jonah, not sure what to say next. noah is very smart for a three year old (almost four) but this isn't something that's easy to grasp. i mean how many global pandemics have you experienced in your lifetime?
"i'm going to do my best to stay safe too noah, but i have work. i'll be around people and it's much safer for you to be with your mom for now."
"i want you to stay with us," he pouts sadly.
"i know son, but i promise to talk to you every day. you can call me whenever you want," jonah promises.
"how long will this sickness be here?"
"we're not sure. once the doctors figure out what to do and it gets better, i'll be able to see you as soon as possible."
"okay..."
"you understand?"
noah nods, "yeah."
"alright give me a hug," jonah opens his arms and noah rushes into them.
this is going to be difficult. i can only hope that this mandatory quarantine situation doesn't last too long.
