eighteen

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18| admission

jeongguk needs to talk to seokjin. so badly. he just needed someone who he can share his frustrations with and jin was always the best option, because he first listens, then talks and gives advices.

he walks towards his brother's room and just like always bursts in, but he froze on the spot when he finds a small blonde fluff ball curled up on his brother's bed.

oh hello frustrations!

he blinked twice, then slowly closed the door behind him and walks towards the bed, his heart beating rapidly, though he tried to ignore it.

he tried, because the closer he got to the sleeping boy, the faster it started to pound against his chest.

the ravenette stopped in front of the bed and admired the sleeping beauty, internally admitting that he could gawk at taehyung's beauty all day long.

it's the first time he noticed the details on the younger's face; his pink pouty lips, that kinda looked inviting, the moles under his lip, eye and on his nose, the one on his cheek.

from the beginning on, jeongguk never denied that taehyung was extremely good-looking, beautiful in fact, but it never affected him.

why does it affect him now?

and why isn't he complaining.

what he wanted to talk about to seokjin was, that he feels strange around taehyung, these feelings so unfamiliar to him, the it drives him crazy. also, that he realized something. he said— no, he almost swore, that he can't let taehyung claim more of him, creep under his mask and see the man behind the strong mafia leader facade. this mindset was deeply engraved on the inside of his mind; he won't let taehyung get to him.

yet, here he is, admitting that he only wants that now.

he wants taehyung to ask him a million question and never stop talking until he knows every little bit about jeongguk. the ravenette would be ready to answer every question.

realizing what jeongguk was thinking, he shook his head. no, this is not the path where he is supposed to go through. taehyung hates him and he doesn't like the blonde either, it makes fun to tease him and he admits, he loves when taehyung talks back and gets frustrated, but there is nothing more about that.

sure, the smaller boy is 24/7 in his mind now, but it has no meaning, right? oh yeah— and his heart is speeding up knowing taehyung is around just for nothing.

who are we kidding?— he just can't figure it out himself.

he doesn't know what all of that means, so that's why he ignores it and tries to keep useless confusion away.

he denies almost everything, but not that taehyung is different from others. very different. jeongguk never felt comfortable with anyone, besides his hyungs and jimin. though, jimin arrived later to bangtan and he needed almost a half year to accept him around.

but taehyung... it feels like taehyung has always been here. close to him.

jeongguk didn't know how he ended up sitting on the edge of the bed, brushing his hand through taehyung's satin-like hair. it felt nice.

"what are you doing to me?" he whispered, eyes never leaving the smaller's face.

taehyung scrunched his nose and stirred a little in his sleep and jeongguk quickly retreated his hand in panic. but the younger only smacked his lips and continued sleeping like an angel.

and the adorable act caused jeongguk's lips to curl up on the edge. he smiled. just a little. but he still did something he hasn't done for years. smile.

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