Wasn't Expecting You

Love

We weren't wrong about it being hard when we got back to college. Between both our study load, basketball and my job, it felt like we hardly saw each other.

I would go to his games, he would sometimes walk me home from work, we spent at least one if not two nights together on the weekend, but aside from that we only had one class together and I needed to dedicate spare time to studying. No matter how much I care for Joey, I wasn't prepared to let my grades slide, nor was he.

For the couple of days off that we had for Christmas, we both went home to his family and enjoyed a quiet Christmas. We came back to campus for New Year's where the boys threw possibly their best party yet. I didn't hear a thing from my mother, not that I expected any different.

Helen and Craig sent a gift to my dorm room and we spoke on Christmas Day. Their daughter had her baby, so they were overjoyed and completely devoted to their new grandchild. I'm ok with not being as important to them anymore, sometimes we meet people in our lives who are there to serve a purpose at a certain time. Once that's over though, you naturally drift apart. It doesn't mean either party doesn't care, you just don't need to be dependent on them anymore.

Now it was late January, Joey had an away game over the weekend, they left last Friday morning, with the game on Saturday. The team stayed away for 2 nights. Then with my work schedule and some assignments worth big marks due, we hadn't seen each other for 5 days now. It's the longest time we have spent apart in the nearly 4 months that we have been together and I wasn't coping.

I never thought I would be someone who is so dependent on their partner. Someone who feels like part of them is missing if they aren't together constantly. Yet here I am, tearing apart my wardrobe violently to distract myself.

I had just thrown an old shoe I've not worn since I got here across the room when the door opened and Harper walked in. Her eyes went wide as she surveyed the amess of a room in front of her.

"Do I dare ask?" She said, picking up a dress from the floor. "Did you have a fight with Joey?" She asked anyway.

"It's a bit hard to fight when I haven't seen him for a week!" I huffed.

"Ahhh, gotcha. This is some sort of weird separation anxiety," she summarised. "So umm, I hate to state the obvious, but why don't you just go and see him?"

"Because he is in a 3 hour seminar and by the time he gets out, I have a shift at work. We were meant to catch up after work, but I haven't heard from him all day!"

"Right, well your wardrobe probably doesn't deserve for your frustration to be taken out on it. Although that top, that one does. Throw it out, I can't believe you even own something so gross," she scrunched up her face at the old mustard yellow top I forgot I even owned.

"I know," I grumbled. "I couldn't concentrate on my assignment so I decided to clean out my closet. I'll clean it up before I go to work," I said burying my head in my hands. "When did I become that girl who needs her boyfriend around otherwise she goes crazy?" I asked rhetorically.

"You love him, and he clearly loves you. It's pretty normal to miss each other," Harper said softly.

"Does he though? Because he hasn't told me! He had plenty of opportunities too utter those three little words, it doesn't even have to be romantic or special, he could say it in bed and I would only care that he said it!"

"Wait what? Have you told him that you love him?"

I looked at the ground sheepishly and fiddled with the hem of my t-shirt, "Well no. I didn't want to be first and then he not say it back," I defended. "But I do love him."