This Is The Moment (9-1-1: Lone Star)

Chapter Nine

She sits at her desk, pulls open her drawer and takes out a few newspaper clippings from when the local newspaper covered her attack and suicide attempt. She grips onto them as tears stream down her eyes, trying to get rid of the intrusive thoughts swimming through her head. She scrunches them into a ball and chucks them into the bin. Without even thinking, she takes a craft blade from the drawer with her left hand and slowly presses it to the skin of her right wrist, pressing hard until it draws blood before dragging the blade, slicing through the skin.

Downstairs, T.K. has a feeling that something is wrong with Avery. 

'I'm going to go check on her.' T.K. tells Owen. 

'Maybe we should give her some space.' Owen replies. 

'I don't know.' T.K. sighs as he shakes his head. 'I have a bad feeling. My brother radar is going off.' 

'Your "brother radar"?' Owen raises an eyebrow. 

'I just know when something is going on with Avery.' T.K. shrugs. 'Sometimes even before anything happens.' He then walks off and makes his way up to Avery's room. As he gets closer to her room, he hears her hissing as if she's in pain. He picks up his pace and rushes into her room. 'Avery!' He exclaims, seeing the blade in her hand and the cuts on her wrist. She looks at him, tears staining her cheeks. 'Ave.' He adds softly as he walks towards.

'I-' Avery whispers as she spins her chair to face him. T.K. kneels in front of her. 'I don't realise I was doing it until I was doing it.' 

'It's okay.' He replies, carefully taking the blade from her hand. 'Dad!' He shouts. He takes a closer look at the cuts. 'You won't need stitches' He states. Owen walks into the room and as soon as he sees the cuts, worry descends on his face. T.K. looks back at him. 'She's fine, can you get the first aid kit?' Owen nods and leaves to get the first aid kit. He returns a few minutes later and kneels next to T.K. He takes out the wipes from the first aid kit and hands them to his son who starts cleaning up the blood from Avery's arm. 

'I'm sorry.' Avery says quietly.

'Hey,' Owen starts softly, holding her hand, 'don't apologise, okay?' Avery looks at him and sees that his eyes are starting to fill with tears. 'You're human, it's normal to feel this way.' 

'I shouldn't have cut.' Avery shakes her head. 'I've been clean for so long and now-' Avery stops, not being able to continue. 

'Ave look at me.' T.K. says but Avery ignores him. 'Avery, look at me.' This time Avery looks at him. 'Relapsing isn't something to be ashamed of. Trust me, I would know.' He starts putting gauze on the cuts and gets a bandage out. 

'Your brother is right.' Owen adds. 'Never be ashamed of how you feel. Ever.' Avery smiles slightly and nods. 'I'm going to go make you a mug of hot chocolate.' Owen stands up and walks out of the room.

'Do you know what triggered this?' T.K. questions as he starts wrapping the banadgae around her arm. 

'Seeing Matthew today was- it was hard. Telling you what he did was even harder. Keeping it from dad is - it's super hard,' Avery responds, 'and then-' she points to the bin with the newspaper clippings in. Since T.K. has now finished bandaging Avery's arm and secured it, he reaches over to the bin and take them out. When he unfolds them and sees what they're about, he sighs. 'I thought that if I kept them then it would be a reminder, later in life, of what I've survived.' She says. 'If I survive that long.' She adds quieter, but T.K. clearly hears. 

'Don't thnk like that, Ave.' T.K. reassures her. 'You'll get through this. We will help you through this.'

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