Highway Kismet

Happy With A Void

I couldn't believe how quick the months had seemed to have flown by, at first it dragged, and each day felt like an eternity but with good company, the days started getting quicker and my healing progressed faster.

I was discharged from the hospital in the first week of January, the doctor was satisfied with my healing and I was more than happy to leave. I was, however, hesitant to get into a car again, but my family helped me through it, and sitting in the back seat between my two brothers – who had grown a lot more since the summer – made me feel secure. Eric was the sweetheart who spoke to me about random things to distract me while Dave acted like a protective big brother and stuck close to me.

Without even stopping by at my place, I bid farewell to Faith, Wang, Owen, and Leo and was on my way back to New York to recover at home. I was grateful for my privilege of having a father with a private jet because it made my journey back a lot more comfortable.

In no time my brothers were back at school, Mandy was a kindergarten teacher and owned a little school not too far from my home, so for the first few weeks, she got her assistant teachers to take over while she stayed back to take care of me. My dad also took some time off work and even though there wasn't much he could do; he still took the initiative to spend time with me. It became a tradition to take a walk in the garden every evening after dinner and then we'd have a warm beverage and watch one movie before bed.

My dad also hired two in-house nurses and a physiotherapist to help with my arm, I thought he was going overboard but I didn't argue – he felt more at ease. I was glad though because my healing sped up and I was getting better as each day progressed.

My grandparents stayed for a month more and my dad insisted they stay in the guest bedroom at his place. Abuela was hesitant but she gave in just so she could be close to me and during those weeks, my family grew closer. Abuela liked Mandy and adored the twins, there was still some hostility towards my dad, but she slowly warmed up him over time. Papa, on the other hand, warmed up sooner and they got along quite well, he even got my dad to smile more.

Things in my life were a lot better, I finally felt like I was part of a family for the first time. the only lacking person was my mom, but I visited her grave often, my dad took me and he would sit by my side for a while then give me some privacy with her before we left. Things were good and I was happy but with a void.

I never saw or heard from Mitchell since that call via Owen's phone, it was almost as if he fell off the face of the earth. I had the urge to call him once or twice but stopped myself, I didn't want to come off as clingy or desperate, after all, he was the one who left without a goodbye.

I vaguely recalled a moment I thought I saw him on New Year's Eve, it wasn't very clear because I was high on medication, but when I thought about it, I could still feel his breath on my skin when he spoke, the soft touch from his fingertips and the gentle kiss on my lips. I wasn't too sure if it was a dream because it felt so real but when I woke up, there was no sign of him and when I asked the nurse, she said no one was allowed to visit that late.

Even though I was convinced it felt so real, I eventually figured it was a dream because Mitchell left, he left me for Liza, and were living their best life together. He didn't think I was important enough to say goodbye, he just left without a word. Even though he didn't deserve it after breaking my heart, I still hoped he was happy wherever he was.

I wished I could've erased him as quickly as he erased me, I thought of him every night before bed and every morning when I woke, sometimes to make things worse I dreamt of him. Initially, I used to look at our old pictures and videos that were backed up and they never failed to make me smile but then I broke into sobs, falling off to sleep that way.