Strawberry Ice cream

Chapter 22

I roll up outside the house, mum's and Mark's cars are both in the driveway, signalling they're in.

The grin is wide on my face and I dart out the car and slam the door open, it bounces off the wall.

"Mum! Mum! Guess what! We won, we only went and won! I can use my share of the money for your treatment! We wo-" I run into the front room to be faced with Mark and the girls all sitting around.

Lottie has her face buried in a pillow and Fizzy is staring at the floor with puffy eyes.

"W-where's mum?" I ask, the feeling of a leaded heart inside beating out my rib cage. The smile already vanished and buried away.

Mark looks up and scoots over. "Come sit down Louis."

"No, I don't want to sit. Where's mum? I gotta tell her the good news."

"Oh Louis," Mark says in a hushed sighing voice. "Jay, your mum she..." he sighs. "She didn't make it."

My mouth feels like sand paper and I see my chest rise and fall hard. "What do you mean," I croak. That adrenaline buzz leaves me so fast I feel like my legs will buckle.

"She's gone. She had a heart attack earlier on. She didn't make it."

I'm surprised tears haven't come yet but the lump in my throat tells me they'll soon come to spring.

"No. No, she's not. She was fine yesterday! She was good even, she was better!" I can't help the raise in my voice.

He gives me a pitiful look which makes my stomach turn. "Louis, she never was getting better, buddy. She just had some good days from others. I'm so sorry."

I hug my arms over myself, feeling like a dark storm is rolling in inside of me. The yellow now turning to black like rot.

Phoebe looks over at me and sees me on the verge of tears. "Louis? It's okay, daddy said mummy has gone to heaven. She'll be back soon, she's just gone for a little while, she'll be back soon." She places a hand on my waist and I pull away.

"No she's not," I mutter.

"She'll be back soon," she confirms and I can't help but snap.

The darkness takes over.

"No Phoebe! Don't you get it? Mum's gone! She's dead! She's never never ever coming back!" I scream in her face, our nose almost touching and I don't realise I've grabbed onto her wrists until she wimpers.

"Louis, you're hurting her!" Fizzy shouts.

I let go instantly, seeing the little bruises beginning whilst Phoebe wails, Daisy confused too, begins to cry and hide behind Lottie and Fizzy.

"Louis, I think it's best if you leave for a while. You're scaring my girls. Get out." Mark's voice is awfully calm but it's laced in anger.

"I-I... argh!" I turn around, slamming the door behind me and hop into my car.

And that's when everything comes crashing down on me.

She's gone, it's all your fault. Ashton's right it's all your fault, you couldn't save her.

Dead, dead, dead,dead, dead, dead.

She's gone. G o n e. Gone!!

My face retorts, hot tears rolling down my face, bottom lip wobbling until I break out into large sobs, the sound filling the car. I slam my head against the steering wheel, my shoulders shaking with the tears that fall and drip down onto my jeaned legs.