The lads left over an hour ago and I feel myself falling asleep against Harry's shoulder, though my mind is racing. The amount of tears I spilt earlier has made me so worn out that my brain feels like it's just shutting down.
The TV is now on, playing a few episodes of Barbie Life In The Dream House (please don't judge my taste in telly shows. It's something that makes me feel safe because the girls watch it and always make me watch it with them). Harry nudges me slightly, I grumble in response.
"Lou, it's getting late, are you sleeping the night?" He asks.
I sigh through my nose. "I'll probably go home so mum- I mean, Mark, doesn't worry." A pang hits my chest at that slip up.
Dead, she's gone.
I mentally slap myself and open my eyes to see Ryan and Ken fighting over Barbie. I look up to meet Harry's green eyes, he tries to mask the pity as he knows I don't like pity looks but he's kinda failing, making me frown.
"Come on, I'll drop you off. I'll drive your car again, as long as I don't crash it." He stands, patting my knee.
"You better not crash my car Haz," I say, a weak smile toys my lips before it falls quickly.
He shakes his head, grabs my keys from the denim jacket and we trudge to the car.
We park up outside the house, Mark's car is gone, leaving mum's vacant, abandoned car behind. Maybe Mark went to grab some bits for tomorrow or something. Maybe he's gone to grab a drink knowing him, it is late.
I walk up the steps and put the key in the lock, pushing the door open to a semi silent house. The lights all switched off, casting the rooms into eerie shadows. I switch the hallway light on to see Clifford running down the stairs, slamming his tail against the wall and licking at my legs. I pat him momentarily and walk into the house, Harry following on behind.
"They're all gone," I state, feeling another pang hit my heart.
Most of the girls' toys from the front room have disappeared, leaving the room look bare and barely used. It looks like four children haven't been living here for the past 6-14 years. I swallow, my mouth dry and need of a drink. I brush past Clifford into the kitchen to find a note stuck to the fridge.
Taken the girls home, Clifford stayed behind, there wasn't enough room in the car. If you want to come home with us, fine, if not, we'll see you later. Take care Louis. -Mark.
I scrunch the paper up into a ball, my jaw set. Sure, he needed to take the girls in but taking them away from their actual home? He called his house home. Sure, to him it's home, but to me and the girls, this, this freaking house with the broken hot water tap in the kitchen, lavender- filled-flowerbed garden, six bedrooms, is our home. He seriously just snatched them up and plonked them in a house they barely even went to for most the months and years. He could've stayed here! That quick transition is going to confuse the girls- well mostly Phoebe and Daisy. They're confused enough as it is, this is going to make it worse.
And I'm not going to be the one to sort out his mess like I've sort out everything else in the girls' God damn lives. It's selfish, I know it is but my mind is thick with fog and I'm broken inside, like shard of glass. I know I'm fragile but the breaking walls are going to stay up. They're staying up until they can't hold this weight any longer, no matter how long that takes, they're staying.
I storm up the stairs and I don't realise why I'm going up here, I'm alone in this house and knowing now that this home is going to be lonely and abandoned from everyone else, makes me feel so much more isolated.
KAMU SEDANG MEMBACA
Strawberry Ice cream
Fiksi Penggemar[COMPLETED] Louis Tomlinson, an eighteen year old college student has his whole life ahead of him. But with his mum being sick and the anxiety and depression getting in the way, he feels alone in this big world. That is until he goes to his favourit...
