The Trials of Being Loved

Part 12 -No, Orca!

New slowly sat up and watched, stunned as Tay walked out of the bedroom. He left. He actually left. He slid to the edge of the bed and fought back tears. Wasn't HE the one who always went on and on about talking things out? 

His eyes landed on the closet and he got up and wandered over, pulling out a pair of Tay's pajama pants. It didn't feel right or safe to be back in his bed. But where can he go? There was no way, after being humiliated like this, that he could face him? 

A light breeze fluttered the long curtains covering the balcony. New finally smiled. Perfect. Slowly, carefully, he slid the doors open and used to the paparazzi's that followed him everywhere, slunk lowly outside. He had no clue if they now knew he was here, but he didn't WANT them to know this way. 

Carefully, he took the cushion off of the lounger that Tay had out there and put it on the cool cement and curled up on it, leaning against the wall. The light breeze blew dried the few tears, and blew away the sweat that remained on his body. 

Comforted by the silence, New drifted of to sleep fast. 

Tay, on the other hand, was stewing like meat in a boiling pot. At first, he didn't know why he was so upset but the look in New's eyes haunted him. As he calmed down in the first 5 minutes, he realized that his words were right: He HAD done the same to New. 

Everything they did to each other behind closed doors unless one of them actually said "stop" or "no" was consensual. So why did he get so upset? 

It made him feel very, very childish to admit that it was because he wasn't the one doing it. He didn't want to BE a bottom. He didn't like his rational mind telling him "How does that make you a bottom?"

The longer he waited, and no New came chasing after him, anger began to build. Then it changed to worry. Had he screwed everything up tonight with his selfishness? 

Still, Tay was stubborn. He might, MIGHT, have to apologize but he wasn't going to make the first move. Oh no, there was no way he was! He drank water, turned the TV on loud, twiddled his fingers and still, New didn't leave the bedroom. 

His temper hit the boil and started to spatter all over. "Fuck you, New!" He turned off the TV and threw the remote against the wall. Hearing it shatter was a balm over his raw nerves. Standing, he stalked into the bedroom to confront New.

WHERE THE FUCK WAS NEW???

Tay looked for him, he pulled the duvet off the bed, he looked under and around, he checked his closet. He ran out to the bathroom and he wasn't in there either. He knew he didn't leave. He was sitting facing the door the entire time.

So where was Newwie? Scared and worried, Tay walked back into the bedroom and sat on the bed, watching the balcony curtains flutter with the wind. I should shut them, he thought, the wind's picked up. 

THE BALCONY! New has to be out there. Tay ran to the door and slid it open to look at his chaise lounger, but didn't see him. His heart plummeted to his feet. He walked outside and sat on the lounger and looked down to see feet.

Feet? Why am I looking at feet? His gaze followed the feet and there was New, sleeping on the cushion. 

Relief washed over him in waves. It was followed by the most intense feeling, causing him to shake all over. He closed his eyes, allowing it to flood his body. "New, I don't think I can say I think anymore." Tay whispered. "I know I'm in love with you."

"What am I going to do?" He watched New sleep in the cool air for a while, then stood and shook him gently awake. "Newwie, come to bed. You can't spend the night out here."