8th September 2012 I'm pretty nervous and excited. The boygroup SHINee is shooting a music video for the song Obsession today and I will shoot with them. My make-up is currently being done. Then Jonghyun comes up to me.
Jonghyun: Hey Suri. How are you?
Me: I'm good and you sunbaenim?
Jonghyun: Same. You look great. Oh and by the way you can call me Jonghyun.
Me: Okay thanks.
Then he goes to Taemin. In one of the shoots I have to be a normal student in front of a school with some girls and in the next scene I will dance as a background dancer with them. I'm pretty excited.
I look like this:
-School student:
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The Lyrics of the song:
obsession 더 떨리는 두 손 곧 떨어질 초점 고장난 내 다리 여기 왜 서 있는지 기억 조차 안나 무서워 지는 걸 방금 까지 웃고 있던 넌 어딨는지 (Why) 장난 같은 소리 날 떠나 버렸 니 넌 저 멀리 oh wow (Why) 희미 해 질까 족쇄 같은 흉터 욕해 놓쳐 버린 날 욕해 무너진 내 심장 은 날 버리지 마 날 혼자 두 지마 외치고 있지만 널 원해 미친 듯 난 널 원해 날 떠난 네 입술 은 사랑 하지마 날 사랑 하지마 널 버린 거 잖아 단지 끝없는 사랑 주고 싶었던 것 뿐 더 넘친 사랑 이 그댈 조 를 줄 이야 상처 난 가슴 에 찢겨진 나날들 길 잃은 사랑, 눈물 턱 까지 차올라 yeah 아직도 내 안에 슬픈 안녕 만 건 내는 건지 (Why) 오늘 까지만 날 밀쳐내 지마 욕해 놓쳐 버린 날 욕해 무너진 내 심장 은 날 버리지 마 날 혼자 두 지마 외치고 있지만 널 원해 미친 듯 난 널 원해 날 떠난 네 입술 은 사랑 하지마 날 사랑 하지마 널 버린 거 잖아 너 제발 눈치 채 주길 난 또 다른 너인 걸 네 어젯밤 의 악몽 까지 감싸 안아 손 을 놓지 마 욕해 놓쳐 버린 날 욕해 무너진 내 심장 은 날 버리지 마 날 혼자 두 지마 외치고 있지만 널 원해 미친 듯 난 널 원해 날 떠난 네 입술 은 사랑 하지마 날 사랑 하지마 널 버린 거 잖아 곁에 (곁에) 차가 워진 네 곁에 찢겨진 내 가슴 은 날 떠나 지마 더 멀어 지지 마 네 손 을 잡지 만 기억해 끝내 널 잊지 못해 버려진 내 아픔 도 난 잊지 않아 잊을 수 없잖아 네가 준 거 잖아 사랑한다 는 이유 조차 죄 가 됐지 깊은 상처 들은 타 들어가 재가 됐지 하지만 잃는 것 보다 잊는 것이 더 아파 올 뿐 숨 죽이며 이별 의 고통 에 서서히 난 죽어 갈 뿐 그 순간 으로 (eh eh eh eh eh) Bring it back! (bring it back!) 날 버리지 마 (지마 지마 지마)
Staff: OK! Cut. You're done.
The boys are also happy once and shout 'finally'. They are for sure really happy that they are done. That was the first time that I was allowed to take part in a music video and it was a lot of fun. I talked to the boys from time to time. They were really nice. I had funny conversations with Jonghyun and Min-ho in particular.
Then I'll be picked up and driven back to BigHit. It's already 10 p.m. I decide to go to the practice room to practice my dance there. Suddenly someone bumps into me from behind. When he apologizes, I recognize his voice. He's the boy from the cafeteria that helped me up when Jae bullied me. He is the smaller one of the two. He hasn't recognized me yet, because he is bowing to me. He looks sweaty. His hair is wet and sweat runs down his forehead.
?: I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to. Sorry
Me: It's okay. Calm down. Are you okay?
As soon as he hears my voice, he looks at me. He finally seems to recognize me.
?: Yeah. Are you a trainee?
Me: Obviously.
?: I'm Jimin. I'm sorry again.
Me: I'm fine. It's okay. Did you just practiced?
Jimin: Yes, why?
Me: Are you going home now? Or do you want to dance a little bit more? Because I just came to dance. If you don't want to it's okay. You must be tired.
Jimin: No I'm okay. Let's go.
Together we go to the practice room.
Jimin: What's your name anyway?
Me: You can call me Bellis.
Bellis is short and means Bellis perennis. Or rather daisies. These are my mother's favorite flowers. And I want to be her favorite. I want her to be proud of me.
Daisies:
Jimin: Bellis? That is an unusual name. The name is very pretty. Did your mother choose the name?
Me: I just chose the name myself. The name means something to me.
