✨L I F E G O E S O N✨

🌻Talking🌻

8th December 2012
I woke up this morning. Jin had his arm around me. I felt safe. Nothing could happen. I felt bad that Namjoon thought I was scared of him. I wanted to apologize to him. But I didn't know how.

It was all too much right now. I had been thinking about Sung Jin for days. The way he touched me and the way he talked to me. I was only 12, but I knew exactly what he wanted. I never said anything. I was scared that he would hurt me.

I thought that was my problem. Back then, my father had beaten me very hard and for a long time. Often for 1 hour. Until I fell down bleeding. I would be passed out. And sometimes I didn't even know what I was doing wrong. But the problem was that I applied this behavior to any male person.

It wasn't that I was stupid and didn't understand what they were saying when they said they wouldn't hurt me. It was so that I don't know if I should trust them even though I would like to trust them. What if they just pretend?

With Jin, I was pretty sure he was worried about me and genuinely interested in how I was doing. At Yoongi too.

I wasn't sure about the rest. Actually already. But what if I was wrong? I didn't even trust myself enough.

It was time to get up. Today was school. I was too late! To be honest, I didn't want to go to school, but I had to.

I shook Jin to wake him up and after 5 minutes he was finally awake.

Jin: What's wrong? Is everything okay?

He had small eyes from sleeping. He rubbed it a couple of times and looked at me. I pointed to the clock.

Jin: It's 6:12 a.m.?

I nodded.

Jin: And?

I looked at him confused. Didn't he understand that we had overslept? At least Jimin, Tae, Jungkook and me overslept.

I got up and got my school uniform. He looked at me and then laughed softly so as not to wake the others. Why was he laughing?

Jin: Do you think you overslept?

I nodded.

Jin: Come here.

I sat down next to him on the bed.

Jin: Today is Saturday. You don't have to go to school today. And our schedule doesn't start until 1 p.m.

Oh no. And I woke him up. I immediately bowed in apology and he shook his head.

Jin: It's okay. Do you want to go back to sleep?

I shook my head.

Jin: May I get some more sleep?

I nodded. Of course he could. But how should I change? I would just keep his sweater on. Was I allowed to do that?

I pointed to his sweater that I was wearing.

Jin: Do you want to take it off?

I shook my head.

Jin: Are you asking if you can keep it on?

I nodded. He was good at understanding me. He smiled and nodded. I hugged him before I got up and went into the living room. I wanted to catch up on yesterday's school stuff. Since I wasn't there yesterday.

𝕐𝕆𝕆ℕ𝔾𝕀 ℙ𝕆𝕍:
I woke up at 9.44 a.m. Perfect. I would go out with Suri today. I looked at her bed. It was empty. Was she awake yet? Everyone else was still asleep. I got dressed and went into the living room. Suri was sitting there on the floor at our table doing homework or something. She was sure to get the material she had missed yesterday.