chapter eighteen
{ unedited }
ALICE STUMBLED THROUGH THE CARAVAN, LANDING AGAINST THE BED WITH A SOFT THUD, THE BOTTLE FALLING OUT OF HER WEAK GRASP. School had given out for the term a few weeks ago and there were only a couple days left till she had to go back and Alice was dreading it. Alice had completely pushed away Johnny, Stella and Yuriko who kept trying to talk to her. Even Carmen, who was roped into the younger girl's troubles by her friends, had been ignored. Alice hadn't spent a night in her own bed for days now and she was either drunk or high, maybe even both, every day.
Alice spent most of her time at Eddie's caravan. After the man had sold her cocaine, she kept going back until she just sorta stayed there. Eddie didn't seem to mind and Alice was more than thankful that she didn't have to face Jean or Otis, both of which she hadn't talked to since school broke out.
Alice had missed this. The feeling of no responsibility, the buzz that came with whatever substance she took, the stress leaving her body for some moments of peace and, most of all, she missed having her mind silent.
If Alice told people she was an addict, they'd think she did it for the buzz and only that but that wasn't the case. Having her brain scrambled with booze or alcohol was the only time her mind wasn't against her. That stupid little voice inside her head stops. She stops feeling so pathetic, so stupid, so replaceable. She stops feeling like a burden. She stops feeling like a disappointment and, most importantly, she stops feeling like she's better off dead than in this world. Alice goes numb to everything and her brain switches off.
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LIE TO ME | sex education ✓
FanfictionAlice Milburn hated how her life revolved around chaos. With her mum being a sex therapist, her dad being an absent author, her brother being seemingly late to puberty (Jean's words, not hers) and his best friend always trying to become popular, Ali...