Lucky Penny [h.s.]

12.

Penelope.

I felt like my brain was melting the second our lips touched. Harry sat completely frozen opposite me, both our heads leaned in as we kissed. My eyes were fluttered closed, my body growing numb as all I could focus on was the feeling of his lips on mine.

We were molded together in a perfect kiss so soft that it felt like a tickle against my mouth. It was only when I moved, tilting my head a bit more and our noses bumped together, that Harry seemed to snap out of it.

He pulled back, a soft smack of his lips leaving mine echoing through the air and I dared opening my eyes. I felt like I was floating, but the look on Harry's face quickly brought me back to earth. His eyes were wide, his cheeks pink and he sort of looked like he was having a stroke.

And I could see it in his eyes that he immediately regretted everything.

"Shit." I murmured, sitting up straight again so there was just as much distance between us as when we had been talking earlier. I licked my lips, pressing my teeth together as I rubbed my palm over my forehead, "I-I'm sorry." I sighed.

He didn't say anything and I let out another breath as my shoulders slumped, "I shouldn't have done that, I'm sorry. I-I know we agreed on no flirting but then you asked me if I was looking at other people and... and I just had this urge to kiss you, and it's completely stupid and..." I eyed him carefully as he still had the same look of shock on his face, "...and I can see you totally regret that." I ended in a murmur.

His eyes finally flicked up to mine, dropping down to my parted lips ever so shortly but long enough for me to notice before he swallowed thickly and then slowly shook his head, "No... No, it's okay. Um – I'm... Yeah." He stammered, and it was the first time really that I had known Harry to be at a loss for words.

He seemed so unlike himself as he was tense on the couch, a small frown embedded in his forehead and the air around us grew thick and awkward within seconds. I let out a desperate sigh, "Shit, I've fucked it up, haven't I? Please, just... say something." I pleaded softly.

He had asked me to stop flirting and then he was so nice to me today, and I completely ruined everything by kissing him even though he specifically told me nothing could ever happen.

That kiss, no matter how short and soft it was, had felt incredible for me. But seeing how he completely closed off right away, made me wish I had never looked at his mouth and leaned in, made me wish that my nerves would've been too present and would've refrained me from doing anything.

"Harry..." I tried to get his attention and he lifted his head to see me, "Yeah?"

"What are you thinking?" I mumbled, nervously shifting on the couch. The movie had ended by now, just the soundtrack softly playing through the living room as it had grown even darker outside.

"Nothing. Let's just forget it happened." He stoically spoke and my heart dropped into my stomach. I couldn't stop the disappointment running through me even if I tried. "Oh." The murmured sound was out before I realized it and I slowly nodded, "Yeah. Of course. Okay." I hated how insecure my voice sounded, but it was coursing through my veins by now.

I knew it had been a bad idea, not that it had been that bad of an idea. Did he really want to forget about it? Was it that horrible?

We sat back down on the couch, but he was in no way relaxed anymore. I was waiting for him to say it, and he finally did after a few silent minutes, "Um... I'm going to go."

I didn't have the heart to argue with him or beg him to stay, but I licked my lips and tried once more, "Should we at least... talk about it? I don't know what to do, I don't want you to leave like this." I shifted on the couch, playing with the sleeves of my hoodie.