She | h.s

thirty-two

"I'm not gonna lie to you right now, I'm a bit nervous," Harry says to me, his guitar perched onto his lap as he finds a comfortable place to stand his phone up for me to see. He flips through a notepad next to him, reading it with his brows furrowed ever so slightly before clearing his throat.

"Why are you nervous? It's just me," I shrug, trying to contain my emotions as well.

"That's the thing, it's you. I don't want you to think my music's utterly shit, you know." He chuckles, making me laugh along with him.

"I'd never think your music's shit," I defend myself, crossing my arms. "If a record company can tell you that you've got talent, what's the opinion of a sixteen year old girl going to do to you?"

"A lot, you're only the most important sixteen year old girl," He mumbles, flipping through the pages of his notepad once again and trying to find his concentration.

I blush at his words, unable to form a coherent response to him admitting that I was important to him.

"Just play it, I can turn around so that you wouldn't have to see my face while playing," I humour him, earning his famous lopsided grin.

"Shut up," he says, shaking his head.

He runs his fingers through the neck of his guitar nervously, taking a deep breath before starting. "I wrote this recently, so it's not completely polished, and I really do hope you like it."

I nod at his words eagerly as he begins to strum, the sweetest sound coming softly from his guitar.

"Nine in the morning, 'man drops his kids off at school and he's thinking of you...Like all of us do... All of us do...Sends his assistant for coffee in the afternoon around....Like he knows what to do."

He sings, humming bits and pieces to fill the gaps of lyrics he had yet to decide on.

"Then it goes...She, She lives in daydreams with me. She's the first one that I see
and I don't know why, I don't know who she is."

He says, looking straight at me and I feel like burning up.

"He takes a boat out, imagines just sailing away, away, away...not telling his mates.....Wouldn't know what to say, wouldn't know what to say, to say."

Strumming his guitar, he hums again to fill the gaps until he takes a deep breath, "This is my favourite part, I've had the bridge in mind for a while," He says and I hum at his words.

"Lives for the memory, a woman who's just in his head...And she sleeps in his bed, in his bed.
While he plays pretend...So pretend"

He says, the strumming of his guitar getting softer and softer until it gets to an abrupt stop.

"And then it goes back to the chorus, where I repeat the word She, all over again.... and.. and that's that..." He smiles sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck.

"Harry that was beautiful," I gape at him, "Seriously, that's some next level lyricism," I compliment his work, utterly blown away by it.

"Stop," He gets shy, blushing as his lips curve into a smile.

"I mean it! It's so good, Harry! Promise me that when you release it you'll tell me so that I'll be the first to hear it?" I say to him, the blush in his cheeks getting stronger.

"You're awfully sweet today," He teases me, making me roll my eyes at him.

"Shut up, I'm just making you aware of what a masterpiece that was, that was so beautiful Harry," I say to him, gushing over his song.

"It's not even completely done yet, and I was thinking of adding a guitar solo somewhere, like a proper rockstar would," He says, beaming at me.

"I think it would sound incredible with a guitar solo, it's only halfway there and it's already my new favourite song." I smile at him.

"Thank you," He says, "I wrote it a few months ago after meeting someone," He says. This feels extremely targeted.

"Lucky person then," I mumble and he shrugs.

"They don't know that," He says, his voice is only a little louder than a whisper.

I nod at his words lightly, unsure of what to say. The awkward tension in the air getting worse and worse with every second that passes without us speaking. Is the silence killing him the same way it's killing me?

"Harry—-"

"Daisy—-"

We both stop at the same time, my lips pressed together in a thin line as he smiles. "Sorry, go on," he says and I shake my head.

"I wasn't actually going to say anything, so you should go," I chuckle, lying to him as my mouth drying in awkwardness. I honestly have no idea why I thought it was going to be a good time to either confess my feelings for him on the spot or bring up the night of our drunken phone sex.

"I wasn't going to say anything either," he says, shaking his head.

We pause. The silence stretching over what seemed to be hours. This is fucking killing me.

"...So what now?" I ask him, smiling gently and he smiles back. Shaking his head, he shrugs, muttering out an 'I don't know' and we both laugh.

"Play me another song then," I say to him, making his eyes widen and he shakes his head.

"Oh god," He swallows, "I don't know, I don't really have any other..." He flips through his notepad frantically, searching for something to play for me.

"I have a newer draft here, but I feel like it would be better on the piano? Like a ballad," He chuckles, "I dunno, it isn't even finished yet and I haven't really thought of others to play for you yet." He stumbles over his words, clearly nervous.

"It's called Falling, though. But it changes in my head constantly," He mumbles.

"Oh, that's fine. If you don't want to play anything right now then that's okay." I smile at him. "Hey, Harry?"

"Hm?" He hums, looking back up at me and I start to sweat. Just a single look from him and his beautiful, emerald eyes, and I could already feel myself start to shake.

"Do you think that some things are meant to change?" I ask a question on the spot, trying to work my way closer to what I had in mind.

"What do you mean? Everything changes, Daisy." He says simply, making me shrug.

"No I know, I just mean like with people. Do you think that some relationships with people are meant to change? To like, shift entirely and turn into something else?" I say, rephrasing my question.

"That depends, is it in a good way or a bad way?" He asks curiously.

"I've yet to decide, honestly. I wanna say in a good way but what if something changes and things go downhill from there? I'm afraid of change, especially with people."

"Well I think that everything changes for a reason, no matter what."

"Even if it's bad?"

"Even if it's bad." He repeats, smiling at me softly.

"Why do you ask anyway? Did something happen with Liam?" His expression shifts and so does mine.

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I nod at him, humming out a yes to cover up why I had really asked him.

I wonder to myself if Harry was just that dense, and didn't understand how much I had liked him, or if he really was just that unassuming of a person.

Either way, I knew I wanted us to change.