Endless loop of madness - William afton X reader

23 - confronting innerself

I gasped for air, using the wall to keep me up. Henry helped me keep safe to the side. I felt my heart racing and tears mixed with seawater, rolling down my face. She needed to learn not to fucking mess with me. I'll fight her, and I truly mean it this time.

"Don't panic, you'll be fine, just keep a hold onto the side and I'll help you get out. Okay, no need for panic." Henry panicked and attempted to pull me out.

"You fucker!" I yelled, grabbing Clare and pulling her in with me. I dragged her under, kicking off the wall to make it hard for her to get back. I hit and kicked her, trying to make her panic and struggle.

I closed my eyes and began kicking and waving around aimlessly, trying to hit her or move her away from the rocks. I got to the top by kicking my legs aimlessly, getting to the surface somehow.

I looked around quickly, seeing I got some distance away from safety, seeing Henry getting into the water before my short limited time was cut by me being dragged down by Clare, who pulled my hair and smacked me in the face. She pulled me down using me to get to the surface, but I held her, hitting her in the face like how she did. How dare she! I hit her, scratching her face and clawing away at her arms with my nails. I made her nose regret being on her face with blood seeping out. I made her scream in pain, taking in water into her mouth, causing an attempt to breathe. Happened underwater. I did everything I could to cause her harm, beating her face with slaps, punches, scratches, and even an attempt to poke her eye out.

We were pulled to the top. The current shoved and dragged us around, as waves drowned us in water. Clare kicked me away, using the water as an advantage to force me away from her and deeper into the water.

I couldn't get to the top as I kicked around and waved around trying to stand where I was. More panic set in as I couldn't find Clare with my hands. I couldn't find her at all, but at that point, the current and rocking waves had pulled me away from safety and my lungs couldn't handle being held for much longer. It was this growing pain in my chest that ached, forcing me to give in, dispute how much I fought against the urge to breathe.

I choked and gasped as water rushed in and filled my lungs, filling every crevice, burning. It hurt with the burning feeling in my chest and I began suffocating. I opened my eyes to see the surface far above me, seeing the water being so cold and lonely, nipping my skin with its deathly chilling grip. At the surface the waves seemed so beautiful, overlapping it yell and it rolled only.

I sunk deeper and deeper, not fighting against the descent into the darkness. If I die then I want Clare to know that I'm not angry. I wasn't. Not at her. This was a big accident and I can be at peace with that.

Ultimately, death's hand took the fight I had, covering me in pretty darkness and comforting coldness. Floating empty, my body went limp and drifted down deep into the dark unknown.

I found myself familiar but morphed and unrecognised, by the feeling of it being somewhere I know. Maybe home, clean walls, soft flooring and holding the same feelings. The same feelings of safety and protection from badness.

My heartbeat was nonexistent, same with my breath. That feeling of coldness was numbing, but I didn't feel it at all. I knew the feeling was there but it didn't phase my body at all. No shivering. No attempting to warm me, or goosebumps along my arms. It was as if I could feel the coldness that coated me. I throw up water while coughing.

A figure rushed around me, hidden by unclearness what was forming in front of me, but I knew it was around. I saw its eyes gleaming over to me, watching me with a grin. I refused to look at it, fearing it might be bad.

"Henry?" I called out. "William?" I looked around me. "This isn't funny." I began coughing, spitting up seawater.

"Where the fuck am I?" I yelled, panicking. I was drowning one moment, the next moment I was here. What was I meant to do? Don't panic. God, I couldn't feel my heartbeat in my chest, nor was breathing faster than possible. Was I dead? No. I can't be dead. If I was dead why was I here, wherever here was?