The mother she never knew) fighting the battle

The mother she never knew) fighting the battle chapter eighty-four

I have just gotten on the plane heading back home San Diego.
All l felt was nothing but guilt
For what l had done. Hurting my husband by having an affair with his best friend, l'm a horrible person for not being there for my daughter who needed me. I was to selfish to face her
Because l feel like l failed Lena terribly for not sticking around
Now l have to go home and face my demons. How can I look Nathaniel in the eyes, and tell him that l have been sleeping with his friend. Things between us haven't been the same in months, l think it took place after Lena had Braylon. That's when everything started going down hill
That was three years ago, l only have myself to blame. Nathaniel's been nothing but good to me, he treated me like a queen. What am I going do
And there's Stefanie, she lit into me hard. Maybe it was the way she spoke to me, it helped me realize how l put to much pressure on Lena on the years. That's why she never came home on holidays, how can I repair our relationship. to have your own flesh and blood, don't want to be around you. Hurts like hell
I should have went to marriage counseling like Nathaniel suggested
l let my pride get in the way,
Most of all friends live in fancy houses. They have grown children
Who are successful, that's when it hit me. I've been treating Lena the same exact way, wanting her to be perfect
Knowing she never liked to being in the center of attention, l kept pushing her growing up to compete in piano recitals. Now She's in the hospital
Fighting a terminal disease and what did l do, l just up and left when she needed me. I never took her feelings in consideration, she won every competition without complaining
Lena was brilliant pianist who had
Gotta trophies, awards and ribbons
She always came in first place. We traveled all over, she wasn't a force to be reckoned with. Her gift got her into the school for the performing arts in London, they called her the music prodigy. Nathaniel was the first one to teach how to play the piano, when she  became a teenager. Lena never gave us any issues, she got good grades in school. We put her in a private school, Nathaniel and l wanted her to have the best education possible. Hillcrest Academy was one of the top best schools in San Diego
Lena had a few selected friends she hung out with, other than that Lena loved reading. She can speak three different languages, l never told Lena how proud of l am of all her many accomplishments. She's a mother,
Wife. I see how Lena is with her children, and the love she has for them. Lena's extraordinary woman who has done amazing things,