love, your sweet p

i've been suffering for a while now,

February 6, 2019

Dear Diary,

     Sorry I haven't updated in a while! We only film on Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays, so there's not a lot to report. Over the weekend, I've come to a conclusion. I'm less good than I thought. We got the filming from the competition back on Monday and I saw so many mistakes. But I'm going to work hard to fix them so I can become as good as I once thought. Onto the pyramid!

     Before I even get to my placement, let me just say that she didn't think the group dance was an ALDC performance. I know we've only been dancing for a week, but maybe I'm not as good as I thought. Oh well, I'm still here.

     Now onto the placement, I was second from the bottom because I did a toe backbend back walkover, I stepped on my foot. It would have been nice to be higher on the pyramid. Being here at the ALDC is life-changing, but I can't change what I did on stage. And although Lilly and I are really good friends, I personally think she should have been lower. She did fall.

     Of course, when Lilly came up next to me, her mom started making a fuss about how it was not a fresh start for them. I think it was silly. Lilly looked super embarrassed. She thinks that Lilly is too good for acro, but I wasn't the one who fell out of their side aerial.

     On top was GiaNina. She was the leading lady of the winning trio. The trio that Abby didn't think would win. She and I are also really good friends, so I felt excited for her. The one thing I learned is that I need to be better. I need to dance better.

     We're going to Wilmington, Ohio, which means we may run into Candy Apples this week, and I got a solo this week! It's called Possessed, based on The Exorcist. In rehearsal, I had to take out my hair and make it all messy. I kept sickling my feet. I have good feet, just not as great as the other kids on the team.

     Also, Abby kept telling me not to look like a hot mess, but I'm supposed to be possessed, looking like a hot mess, so I'm confused. I even get to stick my tongue out in the end! What does or does not count as a hot mess. It's really making me doubt myself.

     The group dance is called Haka. It's so fast-paced, like popcorn. A haka is a ceremonial war dance in the Samoas. This dance is HARD. We keep messing up and doing it over and over again. I counted and I had to refill my water bottle ten times in that two-hour rehearsal.

     I think I forgot to mention the other solos. Lilly has one called Mommy Dearest, Sarah has one called Mission Possible, and Savannah has one called Metamorphosis. It's obvious they aren't going to air all four solos, so I hope they air mine.

     When we got home, Mom and I watched The Exorcist. It's really scary and I hope I don't have nightmares tonight, but at least I'll have better acting. I'll let you know tomorrow. I also hope I figure out what Abby wants in my solo.

Love,

sweet p