spectrum【fem!reader .lookism】

. xlii

The few hours before they go back home, Sarah approached (Y/N), nervously fiddling with her phone.

"Here," she shows her phone screen, where her notes app is open. There is a series of numbers written on it. "Can you sometimes...send me picture of your friends? I also think you're pretty cool so...This is my number."

The (h/c) haired girl blinked a few times to process what was going on. Last time she's met this cousin of hers, both of them were much younger. She didn't think they actually properly interacted then.

It is a bit of a surprise to see the other wanting to keep in contact.

"Oh," came her very eloquent response. (Y/N) clears her throat and tries to think of better things to say. "Yeah...Yeah, sure."

That was a very awkward interaction. She had to use her entire willpower to not grimace as she hears herself.

In the bus on the way home, she was able to detect some sort of atmosphere. She just feels as if it wasn't really her time to insert herself in the conversation mom and Daniel were having. Admittedly, she was a bit curious, though.

Strangely enough, she didn't feel that much jealous of whatever their topic is about.

She still wasn't let off the hook.

By the time they got back, (Y/N) noticed her mother glancing at her once in a while with a smile on her face. It was obvious and honestly made her a bit self-conscious.

She shot a questioning glance to the woman.

"(Y/N)," mon speaks, retaining her warm smile. "I'm also very proud of you."

Said girl felt a warm feeling in her chest. She feels as if her ears also heated up due to her own embarassment. It was so sudden that she felt a bit unprepared.

"I knew that," she mumbled just for the sake of having a response.

She hears a laugh. "I just feel like I don't tell you that enough."

(Y/N) lets out a sigh. When she looked up again, her mom has her eyes ahead, to the direction where they knew the house was.

"I don't regret finding you when I did," spoke the older woman.

Oh.

Now that. That caused a weird, mushy feeling in her chest.

She's not gonna cry from that, is she?

(Y/N) had it in her head for a long time that no one would've actually been glad for her presence. It didn't matter how much she built up her self-confidence, or find herself with people that keeps wanting ti have her around.

She always kind of had it in the back of her mind, when she knew her birth parents hadn't wanted her and her birth relatives rejected her, that maybe no one actually was glad she's around.

She didn't even realize her eyes has gotten damp.

"Oh (Y/N)," she hears. And then she feels something warm engulf her. She belatedly realized it was a hug.

It was...a nice feeling.

"Remember we love you, okay? Me and your brother both."

She allows herself to close her eyes for a while. This Thanksgiving...it really decided to go make her cry, huh?

"I love you too."

-

One particular day, someone came knocking on the door.

"Who is it?" she asks without opening it.

She hears a muffled answer from behind it. While she didn't fully understand what the person said, she feels as if the voice itself was familiar.