STAR GAZING AT HER MOON

Chapter LIX: Semifinals

VICTORIA'S POV:

This week is the first week of April which nakaka-irita dahil andito na si Thirdy which Daddy will always spend time with her, like di ba ako namiss ni Daddy, like Mommy na todo kung makahingi ng tawad sa akin.

Daddy will always check for Thirdy tas laging inaupdate si Thirdy tas ako ni "Hi, hello or morning or good evening" wala tas kay Thirdy may pa I love you pa.

Eh anak nya din ako bakit iba ang pinapakita nya kay Thirdy eh parehas naman kaming galing sa kanya kung tutuusin.

All my life I've been longing for a father's love as my adoptive father left us when I was 5 years old and since that day my life become a living hell, kasi ako daw dahilan bakit iniwan yung adoptive Mommy ko ni Daddy.

Kasalanan ko bang pinalaki nila akong honest at kaya nasabi ko na si Daddy was cheating to Mommy, kaya I changed myself for better. I've become a denial person and used to hide everything from them which nadadala ko kahit ngayon.

I don't know how to work things out but I wish someday Daddy Greggy will look me like how he looks to Thirdy, yung tipong anak din ang nakikita nya sa akin hindi bilang ibang tao.

Kaya mas pinipili ko nalang sumama sa mga friends ko dahil parang wala naman akong paki kay Daddy, eh kung si Mommy din magka-iba kami ng mga gusto.

About music and arts I really don't like it but I still have to work with it para man lang may makita ang ibang tao na magkapareho kami ni Mommy.

Para man lang di nila masabing di ako Marcos as I know that being a Marcos is a dedicated person towards the industry of Music and Arts, but here's me walang interest pero nakikigaya nalang.

It feels like everything I do, I have to work under pressure in order to make them happy kahit papaano.

But bakit hindi ko magets kahit ano na ginawa ko I already know how to use piano and learn painting quite a bit, but I don't still heard Mommy gave me an applause or even compliments it always "Practice more baby, Victoria maybe you should do more sa blending and etc.", like it's not my size of shoes to fit on.

Masyadong maliiit or masyadong maluwag na di ko mailugar ang sarili ko just to make them feel proud about me, but it turns out I'm disappointing them.

Kung si Thirdy kailangan nya si Mommy well ako kailangan ko silang lahat. Si Mommy, Daddy, my two brothers, my aunts, uncle, my cousins and especially Mama Meldy, kasi niisa walang naniniwala sa kakayahan ko.

They will smile but I can't see the happiness in their smiles it's like they're pretending, for what para di ako masaktan well it's hurting me right now can't they feel or see it or masyadong manhid sila sa akin.

But when it comes to Thirdy di ko abot eh, kasi kahit ngiti lang ng bruhang yun masayang-masaya na sila lalo na si Daddy.

I want to be loved also, I want to be cared and I want their support, but how when all my hopes are blocked by this big mistake Thirdy.

Kung tutuusin anak lang siya sa labas but bakit ganon ang family ni Mommy mas mahal siya kaysa sa akin na kadugo nila.

After thinking about the difference between me and Thirdy I just fix myself as we will go somewhere daw kasama mga cousins and dalawa kong kapatid and sila Tita Imee, Tita Liza and Tito Bong.

"Victoria dali na daw bilis magstastart na", Kuya Matthew said while he lean his head inside my room.

"Wait kuya malapit na", I said and take my phone with me and get out from my room.

Kuya Matthew and I are walking downstairs which I'm confused while they're all wearing red shirt except for Mommy which naka white lang.

"Why you're all wearing red shirt with a printed number 3?", I asked which they form a formation which di ko maintindihan nagkabangaan pa si Kuya Luis at Kuya Borgy, tas si Tito Bong tinulak pa si Tita Imee.