It's Our Secret

Ettie's Letters - To Indi

Ettie's Letter: the third part

Hi Inds,

How's it going? Right, I'm sorry. I won't try to be funny, or humorous in this letter. I'll get to the point.

Over the past few years, you've become someone so special to me. Someone who I cherished with all my heart. You were this beacon of change, of adaptation. You guided everyone with your presence, including me. Your courage, and fight, and determination to keep going, even after all the shit you have been through, pushed me to keep fighting. I don't even know how you did it, Inds. You surprised me every day, not because I didn't think you could keep going, but rather you went above and beyond.

You achieved so much in your 21 years on this earth. More so than I ever thought someone could achieve.

When we first met, in Sam's apartment in 2020, you stood out to me. You had a glimmer, a sparkle in your eye. It was as if this world was lighting up, just for you. Your tenacity, and spirit was something I had only ever seen in one person before. Something so rare, but so special.

I'm not sure whether this was intuition, or survivors instinct, but I knew that you had a deeper story than what you showed on the surface. I knew there were a lot of layers to you, India Harrison. And throughout time, you peeled them off. That has been your greatest asset. I knew you thought it was scary, and I knew it was a hard thing for you to do, but you showed so many people, girls, women, boys, men and everyone in between, that it is okay to be vulnerable. It is okay to speak up against hardships and abuse. You gave me the courage to do it myself. I'm so proud of everything you have done to be an advocate for change. For being the figure for mental health that I always needed but never had.

Anyways, I just wanted to tell you that. Tell you how proud I am of you for everything you have done for this sport, and for me. So, when I'm gone, I hope you continue to fight for these things. I hope you never give up your spark, or your will. I hope that your life not only revolves around football in the future, but also change. Changing this world for the better. You're the most inspirational person I have ever met, Indi. You have this way with words that always seem to make people think. Make people act. I hope that never changes. I hope you never change.

Now, Indi, there are a few things I would like you to do.

You're my link. My link between two people in my life. Hayley and Leah. Please look out for both of them. Please help them. Be that person for Hayley, especially. She doesn't have anyone else. Leah has Georgia, and the girls, but Hayley doesn't. She doesn't have her Georgia, not anymore at least. So, when you see her, comfort her. Tell her it's okay to grieve. But also, tell her to keep moving forward. Don't let her stay in the past and dwell. I want her to live the happy life that she always allowed me to live. I want her to fulfil her dreams, and win and win big. She deserves so much in this world, and I was always sorry that I couldn't give it to her.

Indi, I know you have experienced a lot in your life, including grief, and I'm sorry for possibly be adding to this list. I don't want to be. I don't want to be going. I want to be staying, playing the sport I love with the people I love. I'm sorry, Indi. If I can get one point across to you in this letter, it's that I am sorry. Sorry for not speaking up and putting myself first. If there is one thing I have learnt from you is that you should always put yourself first.

I hope that in your future it's filled with love and happiness. I hope you find your person (even though I'm pretty sure I know who that is already.)

Be kind, be loving, be happy.

Bye for now, and I'll see you again.

Lots of love, Ettie