*11* Zee Pruk

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I ran after him

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I ran after him.  I couldn't leave him alone now, couldn't let him think too much about it.  He was running to our hotel, where we were temporarily staying, to be closer to the set.  His condition was much better than mine.  I had hardly gone to the gym these past months, and when Max managed to get me there, I didn't feel like exercising at all.  Nevertheless, he continued in his efforts, he was always somewhere around, and he made me keep on fighting.  Soon I started regaining my rhythm and took a second breath, but I didn't catch up to Nu until at the hotel.

My racing thoughts tormented me all the time.

New, what am I going to do with you?  You don't even know how much I don't want you to go through this!  You think I'm bad person, you think I'm cruel, that I want to use you for my own career, right?  What should I tell you?  What would you like to hear, Nu?  Why don't you know I can't tell you this?  I would like to withdraw, but it is too late for that.  And if I don't convince him, the hell knows what P'Sky will do!  This asshole is unpredictable!  What if he hurts Nu?“

There was a vision in my mind of P'Sky chaining New with a thick rope, setting him in a chair that was the only piece of furniture in the whole dimly lit, stuffy room with no air conditioning whatsoever.  My memories were mixed with the images suggested by my imagination.  Any of us who had worked for P'Sky for a long time knew the man was crazy.  In his presence, you were afraid to raise your voice, you were afraid to breathe even louder.  He was freezingly emotionless, ruthless, didn't know what pity, understanding or acceptance was.  It happened that he was limited only to cutting our salaries, if we did not listen to him, or arranging our schedules in such a way that we would not have time for ourselves at all, but this could still be considered happiness.  If he finds out that Nu is my weakness, he will try to take advantage of it.

"But he will hurt Nu ... I can't let that happen!"

Anxiety tightened my throat.  Before I stepped into the room, I leaned against the cool wall to calm down and catch my breath.  The heart in my chest was pounding very loudly, powerfully, as if it wanted to make an earthquake.  I leaned forward, resting my hands over my knees.  I grabbed every gulp of air eagerly.  My world suddenly became very tiny, limited to only one person, a sweet and gentle boy with a good heart, who only wanted to fulfill his dreams without hurting anyone, and whom anyone could hurt.  Nu was funny, cute, sometimes so helpless and clumsy, a little naive and oblivious to the horrors of the entertainment industry he was part of, but that was what made me want to protect him.  Until I saw him at that casting, I was something completely different, a quiet, quiet, withdrawn guy in his twenties, a lonely old wolf with a broken heart and scars from his past.  He changed me, he taught me to laugh again, he gave me hope that it would still be fine, I was really happy working with him.  I wanted to explain everything to him, but couldn't say anything about P'Sky.  I was ashamed.  Was I afraid that when New found out, he would hate me?  Will he stop respecting me?  Will he turn his back on me?

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