The Pretty Boy and His Sheep || Eddie Munson ||

"With my Life."

IMPORTANT AN: This chapter will deal with drug use. I am not promoting  promoting drug use. Never take anything that wasn't prescribed to you by a doctor, and always take the directed dosage. Please take care of yourselves. Drug use will be marked by !!!!!!!!. 

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Right. Left. Breathe.

Right. Left. Breathe.

Even after crying for hours in Eddie's lap, and finally getting the weight off my chest, my insomnia woke me up. And when it did, I found myself cuddled into Ed's side, back in my room. He was conked out himself, and my tv had s shower of static on it. Glancing at my clock I had it was around 8 at night. Knowing damn well there wasn't going to be anymore sleeping for me tonight, I slipped out of bed, changed out of my favorite sleep shirt which was my iron maiden shirt of Eddie's and into a pair of shorts, sports, tennis shoes, and went for a run.

Right. Left. Breathe.

Right. Left. Breathe.

I pushed myself extra hard tonight. I had already run three miles and I was just turning around to head back. Running had become a sort of therapy for me. When I ran it felt like I was out running my troubles and able to leave behind. It also helped that it helped tire me out a bit, so whenever I got home I was able to catch a few more hours of sleep. Talking with Eddie did help, it felt like the elephant that had been sitting on my chest for weeks, had finally been shooed away.

Right. Left. Breathe.

Right. Left. Breathe

Finally making it back to my house, I was a sweaty mess. Jogging down the driveway, I saw Eddie pacing on the patio with a cigarette in his mouth and the phone up to his ear. Hearing my approaching footsteps he lurched around, his eyes wide and hair an absolute mess. As I got closer I heard him on the phone.

"I've found her. No need to go driving around, I got her." He spoke into the phone before quickly hanging up and tossing it onto the swing beside him.

I stopped in front of him panting.

His arms shot out and he yanked me into him. My face being pressed into his chest. I could feel his heart pounding out of his chest. He pulled away and his hands moved to either side of my head and held it up, so I was looking up at him.

"Where the hell have you been? I woke up and you weren't there." He exclaimed wide eyed and frantic.

"I just went for a run. I've been doing it or weeks. You usually stay asleep though." I mumbled rubbing his wrists.

His brows furrowed and his eyes danced across my face.

"You mean, you've been going out during the late hours of the night, not telling me or anyone where you're at or going, alone? For weeks?" he choked out his eyes glistening with tears.

"I can't sleep Ed's. Haven't been able to for a while. Running sometimes helps." I replied softly.

His stare remained on me. I sighed letting my head drop to avoid his sad eyes and began to speak.

"At first it was just tossing and turning, and I could eventually get myself to settle and go to sleep. Then it progressed. Between not seeing you, losing my job, stupid exam prep at school, knowing that when I graduate my mom isn't going to be there. It all piled up and sleep just evaded me. 8hrs turned into 6, then four, then eventually maybe a 2hr nap. My brain won't shut off, no matter how much weed I smoke, how far I run, how much I clean and organize, how much homework I do, it never stops. And I am so fucking tired Eddie." I said through clenched teeth gripping his wrists that still held onto my head, tighter and tighter.