Last Friday Night ~ tamber

6 ~ 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆'𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒂 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒍𝒆𝒎𝒂𝒏

I opened my eyes as Tara said my name. I must have fallen asleep on the way. I expected that I wouldn't be able to sleep. It seems that my body is terribly exhausted. I really overdid it, I'm aware of it. Maybe it's all really going too far and it's time to try living differently? Maybe I could do it?

I immediately got up from her thighs and pain ran through my body. It's going to be a hard day...or week.

— Shit — I hissed

— Will you pick me up later Sam? — Tara asked her sister

Sam quickly turned to us and first looked at me angry and then at Tara.

— I thought you were coming back now!

— I can't leave her like this — the girl said and I'm surprised a little

Of course you can. I don't need you. Does she want to do good deeds by sitting with me?

— This junkie will be fine. Let her suffer the consequences.

I could say something now. What a fucking hypocrite...

— Sam! — Tara admonished her as if she hadn't called me a drug addict yesterday

I stay silent only because I don't even have the strength to speak. I'm fucking exhausted.
E x h a u s t e d. This all really blows my mind.

— Jesus Tara... — Sam sighed — I will pick you up. And you Amber better don't forget our conversation.

I looked at her, barely taking it in.

— What con...— I started but Tara took my hand and she pulled me to get off with her

She waved to her sister but she didn't drive away until we were home. What an oversensitive bitch.

— Do you have painkillers? — Tara asked me as I sat down on chair in the kitchen

— Yeah...it's somewhere. Probably in one of those cabinets.

I put my head on the table. I am feeling pain all over my body. My brain must have melted. It's the worst feeling I've ever had. For a moment, I seriously thought I was dying, I swear. I looked at myself in the mirror on the wall in front of me. Corpse. It's almost purple under my eyes and my skin is translucent. God, what has it done to me?

— Swallow these — Tara said and put two tabs in front of me on the table — I'll make you a tea and something to eat.

I swallowed the pills and winced. I'm gonna throw up.

— I'm not hungry.

— When was the last time you ate? — she is looking at me suspiciously

Drugs make it hard for me to eat. They cause stomach problems. Sometimes I'd rather starve myself than go through this stomach ache.

— Yesterday morning, I guess.

— So you have to eat.

— Ugh. I feel sick. I can't.

Tara's gaze softens, and honestly it pisses me off. She feels sorry for me. She sees me as a loser. Garbage without a future. I understand it, I see myself that way too.

— Go lie down, I'll bring you everything. Should i go with you or can you go alone?

— I can do it myself — I said avoiding eye contact

I'm ashamed.

— Okay.

As I left the kitchen, I looked at her again and bit the inside of my cheek. Why is she even helping me? What's her reason? What does she want?