Last Friday Night ~ tamber

40 ~ 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆'𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒅𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔

Jill pulled into the parking lot of the store and turned off the engine. I'm sitting next to her, completely broken, staring at the windshield. We went around the whole town, I asked people from school, I visited some, I called, I texted them. There was no trace of her anywhere. She couldn't fucking disappear all of a sudden.

I feel helpless and useless. Tara is who knows where and I can't do anything. I've been crying for an hour, not knowing what else to do. I unblocked her number, called and called and called. I probably sent her a hundred messages, hoping she would read any of them. I just want to know where she is... Everyone's worried, because God knows what might happen at night.

She could send at least one message. One. Not even to me, but to Sam. To anyone.

If she did something to herself... I don't even want to think about it.

I treated her badly when she came to me, that's right...but I had my reasons. She broke my heart. And I can't cope with something like that other than with hatred. Was I supposed to hug her and forgive her after something so vile? I have the right to be angry.

But now my concern overshadows my resentment. I just want her to be okay.

- You love her, don't you? - Jill asked suddenly

I quickly looked at the girl and my breathing became heavier. I swallowed hard, not knowing what to say. I know the answer but I'm fucking sitting here with my future wife!

- Be honest.

She doesn't look at me. Her gaze is focused on the extinguished streetlight in front of us. It's the middle of the night, everything is dark, the only light comes from the car's bulbs.

I don't know what Jill's feelings are about me. I don't want to hurt her, but lying will also hurt her. Besides, she suggested that we would just pretend. That's much better, because I couldn't believe in anything real anymore.

- I did - I admitted - And I guess I still do. But she hurt me a lot.

I felt more tears gathering in my eyes. How is it possible that I produce so many of them? Am I making up for all these years today or what?

- When she kissed that guy?

- Yeah - I confirmed and felt another tear fall from my eye

Jill finally looked at me. I doubt she's happy about my feelings for Tara, but she doesn't say anything unpleasant. She looks like she wants to, but she doesn't. She just leaned towards me and wiped the tears from my face. It was a nice gesture and it warmed my heart a bit. One of her hands stayed on my face and she used her fingers to brush my hair behind my ear.

Feeling the need for closeness, I leaned forward and rested my forehead against the crook of her neck. She placed her hand on my head and rested her chin on me. Jill sighed and I felt the warm air on my skin. I feel very safe with her lately.

- Maybe you want to sleep at my place tonight? - Jill asked - You probably shouldn't be alone in this state.

- Okay - I said quietly

Jill moved away to start the engine. I just leaned back in the seat and took out my phone. Just as I was about to text Sam that I couldn't find Tara anywhere, she texted me.

bitch: she came home

- Tara's at home - I told Jill and she nodded

- Do you want to go see her?

- No, I'm just relieved she's safe.

me: thank god, how is she?

The drive to Jill's house wasn't long. Maybe it's because she was speeding as usual. I'm still a little worried, but the important thing is that Tara is home.