Snowflakes Fall and So Did I

~CHAPTER 49~

It was like I was watching a movie. The memory that has haunted my mind and dreams seemed to have come to life right before my very eyes. I see myself, six years younger, skating with my sister, cousin, and Olaf. We had no skates so it was really just us slipping and sliding, but having a good time nonetheless. Until it suddenly went downhill. I see myself spinning Anna, our turns going faster and faster. My fingers remember the tight ache as they tried their hardest to hold on. They felt the alarming slipping of Anna's hands, getting looser and looser with every turn. I see her body fly backwards, her head hitting the ice, her blood spilling out, and the ice cracking below her. I see myself running toward her and her body suddenly vanishing, going under into the ice cold water.

I hear the scream of her name coming from my mouth, echoing in my ears and making me jump, as if it was currently happening.

I see Jack's father suddenly coming out of nowhere, sprinting toward us and gliding on the ice with no skates with such ease. He was so quick and graceful and brave. I see him dive into the water and I see myself frozen where I stood. I hear the cries of my cousin and the shouts from Olaf telling me to get off the ice, but I couldn't. I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't do anything but stare at the hole my sister had fell through and the little bit of blood that remained.

My hands remember the feel of someone else's, dragging me away to land, and that's when I see him. Jack. I remember how desperate and scared his calls were to his father. How his fear matched my own. And how relieved we both were when his father resurfaced with my sister. I see him performing CPR and the water that my sister coughed up, but she still did not wake up. And Jack's father...he was shivering so bad and was already turning blue. I remember finally doing something and demanding that Rapunzel and Olaf get help. I see them run away. I see Jack holding his father just as I was holding Anna.

I see it all.

I've been seeing it for years. A constant replay of the worst night of my life. A night whose setting that I did not want to come back to.

So why the hell am I here? Why did he bring me here?

"Elsa?" Jack's soft voice manages to release me from my trance and the images of us fade away. The ghosts of the past. All currently alive and well...except one.

"Why did you bring me here?" I ask, my voice so low I'm unsure if I even said it out loud.

"Shit! You're crying. Elsa, I'm so sorry." He steps toward me, worriedly, and holds my hands, squeezing them tightly. "I didn't think you'd react this badly. I thought...fuck! I'm really sorry."

"I'm not..." I start, but a breeze cuts me off, chilling my face, which causes the streaks of tears that I didn't know were there to freeze. It was a sharp feeling, or maybe that was just the discomfort of being here. I wipe my tears away quickly and step away from Jack. "Why did you think I wouldn't react badly to being here? This place ruined my life, Jack. This place has been haunting me for years."

"I thought that since things are good between you and your sister–that she now knows the truth–that it wouldn't cause a negative reaction," Jack explains, frantically. "Maybe an awkward and uncomfortable one, but I didn't think it would trigger you. I...I wanted to bring you back so we can give it new memories and skate together without there being any people nearby."

I'm taken aback and for a moment I'm left stunned. New memories? "I...what? What do you mean?"

Jack smiles, soft yet sad. "For a long time, I hated this place after my dad died. This used to be our favorite hidden spot. We would come here every winter and have Hockey practice. But after his death it was a horrible reminder, which I know it is for you too. But, one day, just out of the blue, I decided to not be so hateful towards a place that gave me so many great memories. I wanted to focus on the happiness I would feel when being here instead of the one memory that haunts me too. I wanted to keep his memory alive. And so I did. And guess what? I fell back in love with it. I'm not asking you to do the same, but I am asking if you'd be willing to experience just a couple hours with me?" He extends his hand out to me, his eyes full of hope. "Let's replace that memory of yours with something good."