This internal view i have on myself is vivid. The dreams i have don't seem possible. Everything i have ever fought for means almost nothing to me because so much has changed. I can't talk about anything anymore because i feel like I'm letting people in. But when i don't talk, i drive myself crazy. I want to get the help i need. Im stuck suffering and I'm basically all alone. Even when i am with you, i feel no connection to you. I feel as if we are just robots that don't know how to actually love someone else . The only person i need to love is myself. I have been feeling so distant with my needs. When i feel empty, i am so used to not having anyone to hold me. I don't want you to be there if it means you are going to bring me down. When there is nothing to talk about, i just want to sleep. I need peace. I need silence but i hear chaos all around me. There is no path for me anymore. I just wake up everyday i hope that god has a way for me to go. And even when i am angry, i still close my eyes and wish i was with the person that makes me happy. I close my eyes and open my heart. But when i snap back into reality, i loose all my warmth. Im as cold as a ice pack. I don't want any of these feelings back. Everyday i look back and i regret trusting everyone. Everything has a motive. And i always tell myself that its okay to be loving and sensitive. Sometimes tears come out of my eyes uncontrollably. But i would rather sweat than cry. I would rather hurt people than be hurt.
YOU ARE READING
World vs me
Short StoryThis is brief but this is the most thorough. As i grow into new beginnings and new paths, I always come across problems that seem like they are stuck with me for eternity.
